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Home » Movies » Movie Discussion » Movie Versus Forum » Denton Van Zan Vs. the Wood-chipper from Fargo

Denton Van Zan Vs. the Wood-chipper from Fargo
Started by: focus4chumps

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Robtard
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Yes, clearly as you can see, if would have been impossible for him to reach the stairs in the 6-7 seconds he had before the dragon came back. The distance was just too great.

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More if we factor in the time that he jumped towards the dragon and made it a shorter distance for the beast to travel.


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Last edited by Robtard on Feb 22nd, 2013 at 06:49 PM

Old Post Feb 22nd, 2013 06:44 PM
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focus4chumps
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quote: (post)
Originally posted by Lestov16
You're the one who's dodging. You say Denton performed blatant suicide as if he jumped off a bridge, when he clearly was in a no-win situation.


you said over and over how he sacrificed himself.

a sacrifice is supposed to accomplish an ends. if not its just suicide.

again: how did he improve the situation?


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Old Post Feb 22nd, 2013 06:59 PM
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Lestov16
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quote: (post)
Originally posted by Robtard
Yes, clearly as you can see, if would have been impossible for him to reach the stairs in the 6-7 seconds he had before the dragon came back. The distance was just too great.

(please log in to view the image)

More if we factor in the time that he jumped towards the dragon and made it a shorter distance for the beast to travel.


laughing The dragon clearly would have incinerated or chowed on him while he was climbing down. No human can climb down a building in 5 seconds. He had zero chance, saw his fate, and decided to make the best of it. He had no chance to survive.

Try again?


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Old Post Feb 22nd, 2013 07:24 PM
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Robtard
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quote: (post)
Originally posted by Lestov16
laughing The dragon clearly would have incinerated or chowed on him while he was climbing down. No human can climb down a building in 5 seconds. He had zero chance, saw his fate, and decided to make the best of it. He had no chance to survive.

Try again?


Why do you insist on doing this to yourself? 6:01-6:07, he climbs about half the way.


It took Van Zan about 12-15 seconds to climb up with gear. Getting down without the crossbow and dropping the axe over would have have well under 10 seconds, which as we saw, he had. He would have also been out of the dragon's line-of-sight when it turned back around, buying himself more time.


Slim chance of survival > Zero chance of survival. Your boy rage quit like a retard and committed suicide out of shame.


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Last edited by Robtard on Feb 22nd, 2013 at 07:49 PM

Old Post Feb 22nd, 2013 07:44 PM
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Lestov16
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Too bad he started climbing at 5:33, which means it took him about 31 seconds to climb up there. No way he could have climbed back down and avoided the dragon. He had about 5 seconds between the dragon being distracted by the arrow and coming back for him. No way he would have gotten off that tower. even if he made it to the stairs the dragon would have just blown up the building or eaten him. He had zero chance. He didn't ragequit. He was in a clear no-win situation. There was no chance for escape.


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Old Post Feb 22nd, 2013 08:11 PM
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Robtard
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quote: (post)
Originally posted by Lestov16
Too bad he started climbing at 5:33, which means it took him about 31 seconds to climb up there. No way he could have climbed back down and avoided the dragon. He had about 5 seconds between the dragon being distracted by the arrow and coming back for him. No way he would have gotten off that tower. even if he made it to the stairs the dragon would have just blown up the building or eaten him. He had zero chance. He didn't ragequit. He was in a clear no-win situation. There was no chance for escape.



LoL, don't make me screen cap pwn you again. At 5:33 he's laying back and looking up the stairs, trying to catch his breath, since we know his stamina is utter shit. Even at 5:36 he's still not climbing.

We have no idea at which time he started to climb exactly, since at 5:37 it cuts to Quinn. What we do know is how long it took him to climb about half way, which is 6-7 seconds.

So as proven, he had a slim chance if he tried to live by taking the stairs down, while he had a zero chance jumping off the tower and into the dragon's mouth. Hell, he could have jumped off the tower on the other side and tried surviving the fall, even that has a better chance than committing suicide by jumping into a dragon's mouth while rage-screaming.

Your boy rage quit and committed suicide. He's a chump; the film facts prove it. There's no reason to believe he wouldn't rage quit in this thread and "win" the same way.


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Last edited by Robtard on Feb 22nd, 2013 at 08:20 PM

Old Post Feb 22nd, 2013 08:14 PM
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focus4chumps
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quote: (post)
Originally posted by focus4chumps
you said over and over how he sacrificed himself.

a sacrifice is supposed to accomplish an ends. if not its just suicide.

again: how did he improve the situation?


:edit: almost forgot:

quote: (post)
Originally posted by focus4chumps
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"Your Lord knows very well what is in your heart. Your soul suffices this day as a reckoner against you. I need no witnesses. You do not listen to your soul, but listen instead to your anger and your rage."

http://lmgtfy.com/?q=denton+van+zan+vs

Last edited by focus4chumps on Feb 22nd, 2013 at 09:38 PM

Old Post Feb 22nd, 2013 09:35 PM
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quanchi112
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quote: (post)
Originally posted by Robtard
Because he's a suicidal rage-boy, as seen in RoF. You don't get to decide when "in character" is on or off, be objective for once.

Van Zan wins this thread the same way he "won" in RoF.
To make a sacrifice and to stop the dragons, sure. To just jump into a wood chipper shows how stupid the lot of you are. It's Mcthetic.


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Old Post Feb 23rd, 2013 03:23 AM
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Sadako of Girth
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Well if that was his aim, he failed. He just provided the Dragon with a last meal.
(Similar to a dog -that cannot punch, of course- eating faeces before it is put down)


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Old Post Feb 23rd, 2013 12:51 PM
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quanchi112
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quote: (post)
Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
Well if that was his aim, he failed. He just provided the Dragon with a last meal.
(Similar to a dog -that cannot punch, of course- eating faeces before it is put down)
The objective was accomplished at the end of the film. he gave his life for his cause. McClane is too cowardly to ever do such a thing. The guy can't even make a marriage work.


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Old Post Feb 23rd, 2013 03:06 PM
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the ninjak
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quote: (post)
Originally posted by quanchi112
The objective was accomplished at the end of the film. he gave his life for his cause. McClane is too cowardly to ever do such a thing. The guy can't even make a marriage work.


Lolz. McClane is warrior born. If his wife didn't wish to be a cop's wife then that was her choice. He proved how important his job is to her by saving her life twice and both their children's lives on seperate occasions.
If she doesn't want him and he respects that, that just proves how selfless the man is.
This ain't Taken where the divorced wife witnesses the actions of her ex then gets moist and needs to get a piece of that action again.


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Old Post Feb 23rd, 2013 04:19 PM
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focus4chumps
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here we go again. over and over about van zan's "sacrifice"

ask them what that "sacrifice" accomplished and they ignore you.

how pathetic.


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"Your Lord knows very well what is in your heart. Your soul suffices this day as a reckoner against you. I need no witnesses. You do not listen to your soul, but listen instead to your anger and your rage."

http://lmgtfy.com/?q=denton+van+zan+vs

Old Post Feb 23rd, 2013 05:13 PM
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Lestov16
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I'll concede the exact circumstances of his death weren't sacrificial (even though it was his overall plan which Quinn used), but that doesn't mean he wasn't in a certain death situation.


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Old Post Feb 23rd, 2013 05:37 PM
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Sadako of Girth
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quote: (post)
Originally posted by quanchi112
The objective was accomplished at the end of the film. he gave his life for his cause. McClane is too cowardly to ever do such a thing. The guy can't even make a marriage work.


He routinely (as K points out) puts himself in life endangering positions for other people and is a guardian.

It just so happens that unlike Dragon-faecesgirl he is indestructible.
(and more intelligent, even if hes not a professor with an IQ of 220, he certainly looks like one compared to Van Zan the featless 'man'.)


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Last edited by Sadako of Girth on Feb 23rd, 2013 at 06:32 PM

Old Post Feb 23rd, 2013 06:30 PM
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focus4chumps
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quote: (post)
Originally posted by Lestov16
I'll concede the exact circumstances of his death weren't sacrificial (even though it was his overall plan which Quinn used), but that doesn't mean he wasn't in a certain death situation.


good, so we agree that it absolutely wasn't a sacrifice

as far as his master plan, all he said to do was split up to different defensive positions. then instead of choosing his own defensive position he climbed the big bird-feeder and attempted to kill the dragon and hog all the XP for himself. then when he knew he sealed his own fate, he rage-quit.


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"Your Lord knows very well what is in your heart. Your soul suffices this day as a reckoner against you. I need no witnesses. You do not listen to your soul, but listen instead to your anger and your rage."

http://lmgtfy.com/?q=denton+van+zan+vs

Old Post Feb 23rd, 2013 08:46 PM
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Scarlet Fox
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Van Zan wins.

A wood chipper is a stationary mechanical device that can be turned off.

Van Zan turns it off.

This thread is stupid. Request it closed!


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Old Post Feb 23rd, 2013 10:50 PM
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Sadako of Girth
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Nah the power socket is not within his reach, things look slightly challenging therefore for Van Zan and thats why "noble" suicide via chipper is his preferred way out. But don't worry, he beats his chest in "manly" fashion and is ineffective as always, but the grunting chestbeating will somehow save face for him in the eyes of his would-be jockstrap holders, as always.


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Old Post Feb 24th, 2013 01:41 AM
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focus4chumps
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quote: (post)
Originally posted by Scarlet Fox
Van Zan wins.

A wood chipper is a stationary mechanical device that can be turned off.

Van Zan turns it off.

This thread is stupid. Request it closed!


sorry sugar-panties, but this topic is open.


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"Your Lord knows very well what is in your heart. Your soul suffices this day as a reckoner against you. I need no witnesses. You do not listen to your soul, but listen instead to your anger and your rage."

http://lmgtfy.com/?q=denton+van+zan+vs

Old Post Feb 24th, 2013 05:43 AM
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Mindset
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quote: (post)
Originally posted by focus4chumps
here we go again. over and over about van zan's "sacrifice"

ask them what that "sacrifice" accomplished and they ignore you.

how pathetic.
He weakened the dragon by at least 70%.


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Old Post Feb 24th, 2013 06:02 AM
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Sadako of Girth
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quote: (post)
Originally posted by Lestov16
I'll concede the exact circumstances of his death weren't sacrificial (even though it was his overall plan which Quinn used), but that doesn't mean he wasn't in a certain death situation.


OMG McClane would have survived that, by building descent feats in DH5 (And in possibly also DH1 roof/firehose and elevator shaft drop/ledge catching-without-tearing-his-fingers, hands, or arms off- feats).

He could have easily jumped down through hooped ladder and after like 20-30 ft or so grabbed the ladder hoops... thusly surviving outwitting the dragon as it is forced to fly on, turn in it's flying circle whilst recovering from smashing through maybe the first top few feet of the smoke stack, allowing himself to time repeat the same drop then grab tactic a couple of times to reach the bottom safely.

But noooooooo. Van Zan had to go steaming in overcompensating for her lack of manliness/adaptation-improvisation skills in a pointless throwaway suicide that didn't help her teammates any, whereas that freefall through the ladder/grab, drop/catch the rungs, redrop and make it to ground level strategy would have further distracted the dragon who by this time would have been butthurt enough to stay chasing her, providing Quim with enough time to arrow snipe the dragon whilst it stalked lady Zan.

Thusly, whilst Van Zan was a empty poser with no punching/fighting skills/ability, she was never going to win any awards for being a strategic military mind either.

But never mind.. I mean: how smart does a dragon really require it's future poop to be anyway? And in that respect Van Zan did her job well. And the woodchipper had similar limited requirements of it's victims also...


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Last edited by Sadako of Girth on Feb 24th, 2013 at 11:02 AM

Old Post Feb 24th, 2013 10:53 AM
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