Random Comments

A husband and wife were celebrating her 40th birthday at a resturant. He asked, "What would you like for your birthday, darling? A Jaguar A trip to Europe? A fur coat? A diamond ring?

She replied, "I want a divorce."
"I'm sorry," he said " I wasn't planning on spending that much."

hehe

four laws of cartoons

1. anyone suspended in air will remain in the air until made aware of their position

2. anyone passing through a solid matter will leave a breach concomitant with their periphery (in english. a character running through a wall will leave a hole macthing to their outline)

3.a cat will always take on the shap of it's container

4.everything fall faster than an anvil

nice laws and all true

Two fish in a tank, one says to the other - 'how do you drive this thing anyway?'

😂 thats the sort of thing i would say 😂

well 2 can't always work, the part about leaving an outline in the wall. when you break something, it cracks and falls apart in certain ways. it can't just break perfectly like that.

a foolproof method for sculpting an elephant:
first, get a huge block of marble. then, chip away everything that doesn't look like an elephant

if attacked by a bear:

pretend to be a fish. the bear will bang your head against a rock to stun you. then atleast you won't feel anything when he rips your arms off

always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.

When we cannot get what we love, we must love what is within our reach. - French Proverb

Peter: I can't pay that much! Wait a minute, they cant make me pay it if I'm dead.... Where it says Name, I'll put "Deceased" and where it says sex I'll put "No thanks I'm dead.".... It's bullet-proof!

🤪

Dwell not upon thy weariness, thy strength shall be according to the measure of thy desire. - Arab proverb

If I die, I forgive you. If I live, then we shall see. - (can't remember whose proverb that was...good one though)

Originally posted by dave123
Peter: I can't pay that much! Wait a minute, they cant make me pay it if I'm dead.... Where it says Name, I'll put "Deceased" and where it says sex I'll put "No thanks I'm dead.".... It's bullet-proof!

hey...that sounds familair...what's that from?

Family Guy

Hooray for Zoidberg

Im tired

By learning you will teach; by teaching you will learn. - Latin Proverb

Good shot kid, I think you got him
Good shot kid, I think you got him
Powww
Powww
Wwwweeeee
Wwwweeeee

Slow down
Hotel, downtown, speeding all around
An AK47 got the power in its barrel to move any mother that gets in my way,
Just another power machine on the freeway