Random Comments

As long as my a orta

She likes her temperature taken the old fashioned way, who am i to argue?

My closet is now a Dutch Protectorate. It has no reciprocal extradition policy.

That is great news! Someone needs to teach me how to do a cartwheel, right the **** now!

Hell, when my sister was 14, she’d been 18 for 2 years.

No, i said it was as much fun as YOU could have w. your clothes on. I own a gimp suit.

How did this happen? I’ll bet its because i switched to boxers!

Thongs are meant to be tight

Nope, never trust a cat that wears make up.

He’s either saying he’s late for yoga, or he regrets the impulsive actions of his youth. That is a thick accent!

Is that cat wearing make up?

He was trying to lighten the mood, but no-one was into the fake beards.

That cat stole my wallet!

Be careful, or hurry? Choose one, i cant do both!

It accurately describes me, AND its rude!

Way to boil a lobster, dad.

I think its time to get rid of my teddy bear.

General rule on porn, if i’m not in it, i feel no pressing need to watch it.

There’s nothing quite like dating a pretty girl w. a lisp.

Sorry, honest mistake. I never would have tackled you if i’d known you were pregnant. I thought you were Samoan.

Everywhere I go I see the same old hoe.

Time was, if we wantrd to get drunk, we had to drive to the liquor store, like some kind of animals.