Best Comic Quotes Ever
"Bring it on, Blob. I've been kicking your fat ass since I was thirteen."
Iceman to Blob, Uncanny X-Men #403
And my personal favorite:
"I just wanted to say that your behavior towards Peter was nothing short of deporable, you shallow-minded unconscionable piece of rat &#%#!! No wonder no one reads your piece of crap paper, you ecomaniac! Oh, and nice mustache! Hitler called. He says he wants his "look" back!!!"
Aunt May to JJJ, Ultimate Spiderman #48
venom:"get ready web spinner cause i'm going to eat your brai---"
Spidey:"No! don't say that! I just don't think I can stand to hear that today!"
venom:"Okay! how about I just do it for a change that would be different for both of us"
Juggernaught: "I been swattin you gnats for half an hour already spidey,,,so what say you guys just oack it in annd give me a break"
Spidey: "did france give up in world war 2? did custer walk away from the little big horn? did (hech I can't think of any more witty lines) oh yeah okay-----Did I give up last time I fought you?....NO!"
Wolverine:"graahhharr"
Shatterstar" oh really?........please even I don't growl."
<insert short fight scene here>
Shatterstar:"aaaaarrrrghhh!"
Wolverine:"see, you do growl"
wolverine:"I've heard alot of horrible stuff in my time sicko but yours takes the cake, I say if you like death so much,,,maybe ITS TIME YOU GOT UP CLOSE AND PERSONAL WITH IT,,,AAAAARRRRGGGHHH!"
Superman:"darkseid.............SHUT THE HELL UP!" (POW)
and his speech to darkseid after darkseid disintigrated supergirl.
and even though it's not really a quote, the comic of wolverine, where mr. fixit goes to madripoor and patch keeps besting him in a "battle of witt" I suppose you might call it. that whole arch is pretty funny.
While jamming his pistol in a fat man's mouth, " ... food is NOT sex! Say it with me!"
"FFFfddddd ifff Noff FEEExxxx"
"Good. It's important to know the difference, or you could have a horrible waffle iron accident. No amount of smooth maple syrup will help you then."
~ Agent X 4
" 'Smart'? Lemme see... two plus two still equals five, doesnt it? "
~Carnage, Amazing spider-man 379
" He dragged 'im back inside... back into the fire. I didn't know what to do, so I just stood there on the street. Watching it burn. "
" Did you enjoy it? "
" Not as much as I should have. "
~ Bullseye, Bullseye's greatest hits #1
Jean: "I must confess, infuriating and arrogant as Gambit can be... those eyes, that grin, the body -- it takes a girl's breath away."
Scott: "Oh really? When next the opportunity presents itself... remind me to drop a truck on him."
Xavier: "Cyclops."
Scott: "A big truck."
Xavier: "Cyclops."
Scott: "A really big truck."
- From X-men, 1
Scott: "I'm sorry. My mind must have been..elsewhere."
Jean: " The gutter, perhaps?"
- From X-men, 8
" Training : Day Two
Ha Ha ha! Outsmarted Taskmaster today! Ha Ha ha! Was hurting me
very badly as Wolverine. Hour of healing totally insufficient! Taskmaster
unconcerned with multiple grevious wounds inflicted on me so, came up
with a cunning plan-amundo! Bled profusely on Wolverine shirt, so TM doesn't wear again! Ha ha ha! Score one, me! Sorry journal, bleeding on you also.
Note; Bring more bandages tomorrow. "
" Agent X ", Agent X vol 1, issue#1.
"Deadpool: Welcome wayward Traveler...to CASA DE DEADPOOL!
- Agent Jackson & Deadpool enter a room filled with prostitutes.-
Agent Jackson: My God Wade...It looks like a Russ Meyer movie in here!
Prostitute: Your robe your sexiness. * to Deadpool*
Deadpool: How many times do I have to tell you?! NO WIRE HANGERS! -- Now bring our guests a Fresca and three pounds of M&M's...and if I see ONE red one in there you'e getting deflated!
-Agent Jackson looks at Deadpool stunned while Deadpool smirks and smokes a BUBBLE pipe.-
Deadpool: Heh, heh -- My pimp hand is STRONG."
Deadpool : Agent of Weapon X #58.
"Jean: "I must confess, infuriating and arrogant as Gambit can be... those eyes, that grin, the body -- it takes a girl's breath away."
Scott: "Oh really? When next the opportunity presents itself... remind me to drop a truck on him."
Xavier: "Cyclops."
Scott: "A big truck."
Xavier: "Cyclops."
Scott: "A really big truck."
- From X-men, 1"
Hahahaha that was quite funny.
Then Cyclops realises he can't do such a thing.
-AC
Lobo: "Ahh great, now im gonna have to wait till my body regrows itself! Why wouldnt ya die easy like some normal creep? Ya some kinda perv or something?"
The Mask: "Sticks and stones may break my bones but names will never hurt me!"
Lobo: "Izzat so? Well how about these Butt-face, drong-wit, geekoid!"
The Mask: "pah, amateur. Doodlings Sir! Water off a ducks back! You chew on these! Colon Breath! Spleen Face! Chintz Head!"
Lobo: "What? Nobody says that ta me ya foul-mouthed fraggin feeb!"
The Mask: "Suppurating sore-features! Fart-brain, Cutesy boy!"
Lobo: "CUTESY BOY? Bastard!"
*shplink* The mask instantly becomes whole.
The Mask: "I, of course, dont have the hassle of waiting for a new body to grow!"
Lobo: "huh?"
The Mask proceeds with making Lobo eat his own words... by manually pulling the speech bubbles out of his jacket and cramming them down his throat, then plays ball with his head.