Things SW characters will NEVER say...

The younglings beat the crap out of ani and he shows up near the clone commander seeking help with one yongling still grabed to his hair:

Anakin: Please, help me aaaaaaaaaah!

Clone to Cmd: Oh christ! Why do we have to hang with this loser!?

Cmdr: Emperor's orders ... sighs.... Kill him, I won't tell. We'll say that he fell in battle. We'll have our 65464861565645616546546164 brothers to back up our lie

Anakin jumps off of speeder towards Zam's speeder and misses.

Anakin: ****, oh well, my master will come and rescue me.

Anakin looks up to see Obi's speeder going in the completely opposite direction.

Anakin: D*** Darth Maul! if he hadn't killed Qui-Gon...

Darth Vader: You have insulted me... so I will promote you to admeral.
Stormtrooper: WHAT! I DON'T WANT TO BE ADMERAL!

Yoda to Mace; Master Windu, the use of rogaine against the jedi code it is not.

Sidious: Execute order 66
Cody: WHAT?! YOU MUST BE OUT OF YOUR MIND OLD BAG. NOW THAT WE'RE WINNING??!!! FORGET IT PAL. IT'S NOT GONNA HAPPEN. NOT IN A MILLION YEARS. I'M GONNA TELL

Originally posted by Darth-Yareal
Yoda to Mace; Master Windu, the use of rogaine against the jedi code it is not.

😱 😂 You don't miss a beat, do you? 😆

younglings beat the crap off the clones

Palpatine: Execute order 66!

Cody: Yeah right, maybe if you had told me BEFORE I gave him back his lightsaber. You do it yourself fat head.

Two clones on Kashyyk: Against Master Yoda? Do you think we're retards or something? Maybe if we had the death star or something...

WATTO: "I have wings. I am small. So WTF do you mean saying I can't be a fairy ?"

SIDIOUS: "Execute Order 66 !"
CLONE TROOPER: "Shut the **** up, idiot. It is 'Execute all Jedi and than use route 66 to come back to Coruscant.' Senile b1tch !"

COUNT DOOKU: It is obvious this contest will not be decided by our knowledge of the Force, but by our skills with a lightsaber.
YODA: Get owned bad you want realy ?

Dooku just have returned to Coruscant
DARTH SIDIOUS: Welcome home, Lord Tyranus. You have earned yourself a nice free day in the gay bar with Lord Mauls lower half.

After Padme fell out of that gunboat in AOTC:
CLONE TROOPER: Are you all right?
PADMÉ: No. Let's do it again, Sam.

NUTE GUNRAY: We must send all available droids into battle.
RUNE HAAKO: We must get the cores of our ships back into
space.
DOOKU: We must shut up when the great Sith Lord Dooku is thinking.

Anakin just defeated Dooku in the beginning of ROTS:
SIDIOUS: Kill him, kill him. Na na na na naaaaa naaaa ! K I L L H I M !
ANAKIN: I can't - I suffer from a bad diarrhea. I'll be back in 10 minutes. WHERE ARE THE GODDAMN TOILETS ?!?

LOLOLOLOLLOLOL

Qui gon: Republic credits will do
Watto: stop wavering that f*ck*n hand and stick up yer a*se

Sidious: Rise
Vader: Not now. I'm a bit tired I'll stay here if you don't mind.

C3P0. beebpepej
R2D2: WTF are you talkin about?!

Han: so, you and luke...
Leia: Are you mad. Luke's just a kid. I shagged chewie
Han: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

lol, nice ones Nai Fohl.

Yoda reflects lightning back at Dooku, nearly killing him.
Dooku: Holy s***! I'm outta here!

Maul kills Qui-Gon.
Obi: YEEESSSS!!!!! You have no idea how annoying that guy's preaching would get. (whiny imitative voice) I don't sense anything! Be mindful of the living force and not of the future! Anakin is the chosen One! This gungan may be of help! (stops imitating). Quick, kill him before he makes me promise to train that whiny brat or something!

jar jar: whatas that ani?
Ani (young age): It's my lighsaber. I've built it when I was still in my mothers belly
jar jar : show tosa me (jar jar grabs the saber and ignites it directly in the face
ani: Holy shit, now that's pod racing

*TPM Anakin is coming out of the trade federation ship in his naboo starfighter stupidly cheering when he's not even out of the blast radius. He gets blown up.*
Nabo Pilots: Good riddance. That d*** 9 year old made us look bad by accidentally being forced into the ship, accidentally landing in perfect firing radius of the core, and accidentally firing proton torpedoes right at the core.

Obi: Use the Force luke! Let go Luke!
*Luke shoots a proton torpedo at the Death Star... and misses.*
Luke: Thanks Ben, I knew I could count on you to talk me out of using a perfectly good targeting computer that can fire stuff within a hair's breath of the target, and make me look bad by NOT destroying this moon sized battle station and letting the Rebel Alliance and only hope of freedom die because you...
*Millenium Falcon blasts Luke's X-Wing into oblivion before going into hyperspace.*
Han: he's worse than the princess! Just won't shut up...

ESB Yoda (talking to Obi's spirit about Luke): Much whininess I sense in him. like his father.

Darth Rankkor: I loved your last quotes about Sidious and Vader, then about Han and Leia. LMAO.

Qui-gonn to Watto; Republic credits will do fine. Watto to Qui-gonn; Okey dokey.

Chewie: Rar Raaawar rar rer wraaaaaaaaa argh ag raaaaa rah ah ah raaaaaaaaargh.

Beginning of ROTS:

OBI-WAN: Artoo, locate the Chancellor.
ANAKIN: Tap into the ship's computers.
ARTOO: Screw you !

OBI-WAN: I sense a trap.
ANAKIN: Next move?
OBI-WAN: Take that vibrator out of my ...

Obi-Wan leaving Padmes bedroom:
OBI-WAN: You still have much to learn, Anakin.

Battle droids trying to arrest Anakin and Obi-Wan:
DROID 1: Hands up, Jedi! Don't move.
DROID 2: Roger, roger.
DROID 3: Siegfried, Siegfried.
DROID 4: Roy, Roy.

Anakin facing Dooku:
ANAKIN: My powers have doubled since the last time we met, Count. I am twice as powerful. Two times. 200 %. Can you count, Count ?

Anakin standing in a big puddle:
ANAKIN: ... I couldn't stop myself.

Padme talking to Anakin:
PADME: Annie, I want to have our baby back home on Naboo. We could go to the lake country where no one would know . . . where we would be safe. Where we can do it like rabbits. Where you can **** me like an animal...

After Anakins nightmare/vision about Padme dying:
PADME: Annie are you ok ? Annie are you ok ? Are you ok, Annie ?

Obi-Wan talking to Padme:
OBI-WAN: Anakin is the father, isn't he?
PADME: You won't get away without paying alimonies.

Sidious in his office after Yoda walks in;did you bring the hieniken? 🍺 🍺

Mace Windu; Have a taste of my new beer Samuel Jackson, MMMM,MMMM be--octh

😱 Nai Fohl should do stand up!

LMAO!!! That was awesome Nai Fohl!

Anakin: I see through your lies Palpatine, I know you're lying to me and trying to get me to turn to the dark side so I will try and kill my best friend, kill my wife, kill all the Jedi, save your life, and do all of your work for you. What do you think I am? A nitwit?
Palpatine: uh...