Originally posted by bilb
told ya. i'm done.. i am not wasting any more energy arguing semantics with anyone who has yet to actually live a life where things arent as easy as they seem in a textbook
I knoiw I know...I can't let it go but still.....I never said that what you did is more wrong or more right...I am just stating what I believe to be the truth........
Well going back to the topic...I don't believe its really is necessary to slap kids around...If your kids respect you, they will listen to you....But first the parent must earn the child's respect for that to work....There are times, however, when very little children don't quite understand the issues that are at hand, and so a swat never hurt anyone.....
Example....I had a kid bit me...and after I repeatedly said stop with no attempt on his part to do so....I bit him back.....NOW...that he took notice of..
Originally posted by debbiejo
Well going back to the topic...I don't believe its really is necessary to slap kids around...If your kids respect you, they will listen to you....But first the parent must earn the child's respect for that to work....There are times, however, when very little children don't quite understand the issues that are at hand, and so a swat never hurt anyone.....Example....I had a kid bit me...and after I repeatedly said stop with no attempt on his part to do so....I bit him back.....NOW...that he took notice of..
😆 my sister does teh same thing with her kid
i usually go through the whole spectrum of punishment BEFORE spanking.. saying no, talking about it, time out, taking away privileges etc.. BEFORE i spank them.. but if all else fails Spanking them WILL get their attention and let them know you mean what you say
Alright.. i've read this thread from start to finish...
Firstly, i believe that discipline is a neccessary evil...
Without it children learn nothing of boundaries and their sense of right and wrong can be severely impaired imo...
Beating imo is wrong, and i know that from firsthand experience...
Slapping imo when used purely for disciplinary purposes and not to take out your anger can be justified...
Children are not born well adjusted, they are not born knowing right from wrong...
Its our job to teach them that...
I don't have children, but i am the oldest of four kids and remember plenty about how they and i were brought up...
Discipline in alot of cases is neccessary imo... without it i think alot of kids would be total f*ck ups...
Originally posted by pr1983Without it children learn nothing of boundaries and their sense of right and wrong can be severely impaired imo...
Beating imo is wrong, and i know that from firsthand experience...
Slapping imo when used purely for disciplinary purposes and not to take out your anger can be justified...
indeed.. pretty much says it all i think
Originally posted by bilb
😆 my sister does teh same thing with her kidi usually go through the whole spectrum of punishment BEFORE spanking.. saying no, talking about it, time out, taking away privileges etc.. BEFORE i spank them.. but if all else fails Spanking them WILL get their attention and let them know you mean what you say
✅ ....and you can tell a big difference in kids that have not been disciplined at all....Makes me want to slap the mother....
Also, I believe in never humiliating them....and never in public...It's only common respect.....you want your kids to respect you....then you must give them respect also....
Originally posted by bilb
BF do you have kids?? Cause before I had em I used to say the exact same thing. you know what I found out? Psychological studies dont mean shit on this issue.. I swore I would NEVER spank my kids,, was all high & mighty on the 'proper' type of discipline & the use of positive reinforcement.. thats all well & good but there are alot of times when spanking is the only thing that works.. my kids are not mentally unstable (cant believe I just typed that seeing as how much they drive ME insane 😛) and while I have my faults I am a good parent so such a cut & dry statement as "A good parent of a normal, mentally sound child should never have to resort to spanking, simple as that" is not only inaccurate its offensive...
There's an exception for every rule, and perhaps your an exception. I don't know you or your kids so I'm not going to make any judgements about you, your parenting or your kids.
However, what I said is still generally true. Spanking causes more harm then good.
And no I don't have kids, but when I do I won't spank them.
Originally posted by BackFire
There's an exception for every rule, and perhaps your an exception. I don't know you or your kids so I'm not going to make any judgements about you, your parenting or your kids.However, what I said is still generally true. Spanking causes more harm then good.
And no I don't have kids, but when I do I won't spank them.
Fair enough.. thanks for the well worded reply 🙂
i think syren hit the nail on the head earlier...
when your younger you tell yourself you'll let your kids have freedom, they can go out and drink and smoke and whatnot... basically let them do what you weren't allowed to do...
then you get a bit of perspective and you think "hey, i want this kid to do well and go to college" so you do exactly the same thing your parents did...
slapping i think falls into this kind of mentality...
Originally posted by pr1983
i think syren hit the nail on the head earlier...when your younger you tell yourself you'll let your kids have freedom, they can go out and drink and smoke and whatnot... basically let them do what you weren't allowed to do...
then you get a bit of perspective and you think "hey, i want this kid to do well and go to college" so you do exactly the same thing your parents did...
slapping i think falls into this kind of mentality...
Doesn't work for everyone:
A) I was allowed to go out and drink, and smoke if I had really pushed it. I could and can practicly anything I want.
B) wether or not my kid goes to college is something I don't give a damn about.
C) I never got slapped or spanked so.
So this doesn't work for everyone. Nice theory tho
Originally posted by Fire
Doesn't work for everyone:A) I was allowed to go out and drink, and smoke if I had really pushed it. I could and can practicly anything I want.
B) wether or not my kid goes to college is something I don't give a damn about.
C) I never got slapped or spanked so.
So this doesn't work for everyone. Nice theory tho
I think the point is that you make all kinds of assumptions when you are talking about having kids, then once you actually have them reality comes into play and your views can change real dramatically real quick
Originally posted by Fire
Doesn't work for everyone:A) I was allowed to go out and drink, and smoke if I had really pushed it. I could and can practicly anything I want.
B) wether or not my kid goes to college is something I don't give a damn about.
C) I never got slapped or spanked so.
So this doesn't work for everyone. Nice theory tho
its based on personal experience... and i believe its the rule rather than the exception...
bilb speaks from experience, which holds far more weight in a discussion such as this, than guesses and speculation on what people WOULD do IF they were parents, which is irrelevant and not even worth discussing.
the simple fact is that some kids are far more testing then others. for some, a simple "ENOUGH!" is sufficient, and for others, laughable.