Originally posted by Vathu
What goes through the door without pinching itself?
What sits on the stove without burning itself?
What sits on the table and is not ashamed?
Me.
I dont pinch myself when i walk through the door.
I dont burn myself when i sit on a stove, cause its not on when i sit on it.
Im not ashamed when i sit on a table. 😛
A recruit was last in line for a field exersive. When the supplies of mock guns rang short, he was left without anything. The sergeant in charge reassured him.
"It's okay, son. Here, take this broom; all you gotta do is yell 'Bangity-bang-bang'."
The soldier takes the broom. "What about the bayonet, sir?"
The sergeant rips several straws off the broom and tapes them on the end. "There. All you gotta do is yell 'stabbity-stab-stab'."
So the soldier runs out onto the field and one of the opposite team members charges him. He points the broom. "Bangity-bang-bang!" The opposing man falls.
Another charges him, this time in close. So he raises the broom. "Stabbity-stab-stab!" Again, the opposing man goes down.
After a loud string of bangity-bang-bang's and stabbity-stab-stabs, the lone recruit had mowed down most of the enemy.
Yet another enemy comes out, this time walking slowly and bent over double. The recruit points his broom again. "Bangity-bang-bang!"
Yet the other soldier doesn't go down. The recruit tries again. "Stabbity-stab-stab! Bangity-bang-bang!"
The other man was close now, and threw the broom weilder to the ground with a mightly judo throw. Leaving the broom holder winded, he grinned malevolently down into the other's face. "Tankity-tank-tank."
Originally posted by DarkC
A recruit was last in line for a field exersive. When the supplies of mock guns rang short, he was left without anything. The sergeant in charge reassured him.
"It's okay, son. Here, take this broom; all you gotta do is yell 'Bangity-bang-bang'."
The soldier takes the broom. "What about the bayonet, sir?"
The sergeant rips several straws off the broom and tapes them on the end. "There. All you gotta do is yell 'stabbity-stab-stab'."So the soldier runs out onto the field and one of the opposite team members charges him. He points the broom. "Bangity-bang-bang!" The opposing man falls.
Another charges him, this time in close. So he raises the broom. "Stabbity-stab-stab!" Again, the opposing man goes down.After a loud string of bangity-bang-bang's and stabbity-stab-stabs, the lone recruit had mowed down most of the enemy.
Yet another enemy comes out, this time walking slowly and bent over double. The recruit points his broom again. "Bangity-bang-bang!"
Yet the other soldier doesn't go down. The recruit tries again. "Stabbity-stab-stab! Bangity-bang-bang!"The other man was close now, and threw the broom weilder to the ground with a mightly judo throw. Leaving the broom holder winded, he grinned malevolently down into the other's face. "Tankity-tank-tank."
i dont get it 😐
Andy dislikes the catcher. Ed's sister is engaged to the second baseman. The center fielder is taller than the right fielder. Harry and the third baseman live in the same building. Paul and Allen each won $20 from the pitcher at pinochle. Ed and the outfielders play poker during their free time. The pitcher's wife is the third baseman's sister. The pitcher, catcher, and infielders except Allen, Harry, and Andy, are shorter than Sam. Paul, Andy, and the shortstop lost $50 each at the racetrack. Paul, Harry, Bill, and the catcher took a trouncing from the second baseman at pool. Sam is involved in a divorce suit. The catcher and the third baseman each have two children. Ed, Paul, Jerry, the right fielder, and the center fielder are bachelors. The others are married. The shortstop, the third baseman, and Bill each cleaned up $100 betting on the fight. One of the outfielders is either Mike or Andy. Jerry is taller than Bill. Mike is shorter than Bill. Each of them is heavier than the third baseman.
Using these facts, determine the names of the men playing the various positions on the baseball team.