Translating the Movie...

I'll try...the 'persuade' me scene....

Gibbs: Beckett!
Translation: The little ponce in the wig...

Elizabeth Swann: Yes, they're signed, Lord Cutler Beckett of the East India Trading Company.
Translation: The arrogant little ponce in the wig...

Jack Sparrow: Agh.
Translation: I had a wig like that, once...

Gibbs: Will was working for Beckett, and never said a word.
Translation: The little arrogant ponce in the wig AND the whelp...its like a double act gone wrong!

Jack Sparrow: Agh.
Translation: I was a eunich in a wig...once....

Gibbs: Beckett wants the Compass. Only one reason for that.
Translation: He's lost his own...

Jack Sparrow: Of course. He wants the chest.
Translation: What i would give for a chest right now...I wonder if Elizabeth would protest if i stuck my head between hers....

Elizabeth Swann: Yes, he did say something about a chest.
Translation: I wonder if jack would protest if i stuck his head between mine right now....

Gibbs: If the company controls the chest, they controls the sea.
Translation: Why cant I have a chest to put my head between?

Jack Sparrow: A truly discomforting notion, love.
Translation: I'd watch it if i were you Elizabeth....Gibbs hasn't had any in a while....

Gibbs: And bad. Bad for every mother's son what calls himself a pirate. I think there's a bit more speed to be coaxed from these sails. Brace the foreyard!
Translation: I'm off to find myself a chest....Even if it is a mans....

Jack Sparrow: Might I inquire as to how you came by these?
Translation: I need to find an exuse to talk to you on your own now that Gibbs has done a runner.

Elizabeth Swann: Persuasion.
Translation: Did that sound too forward?

Jack Sparrow: Friendly?
Translation: Did she just sound forward, or is it just me?

Elizabeth Swann: Decidedly not.
Translation: No... don't be ridiculous, if i wanted to sound forward i would have said 'you, me and a bottle of rum in your cabin in two minutes...and bring your pistol...and i don't mean the one on your hip...'

Jack Sparrow: Will strikes a deal for these and upholds it with honor. Yet you're the one standing here with the prize. Full pardon, commission as a privateer on behalf of England and the East India Trading Company. As if I could be bought for such a low price.
Translation: Yes...thats it....keep talking fast enough for her not to realise you are mentally undressing her....is it odd i find her utterly ravishing in those mens clothes?....i think i have been around men for too long....

[Jack tucks the Letters into his coat and begins to walk away]
Translation: Pide-piper style...let her do the chasing....

Elizabeth Swann: Jack, the Letters, give them back.
Trabslation: Jack, the letter, let me dive into your coat and get them...hoping you have put them further south than i originally thought you did....

Jack Sparrow: No. Persuade me.
Translation: No...come and get them...i think you'll be surprised as to where i've really hidden them...

Elizabeth Swann: You do know Will taught me how handle a sword.
Translation: Well...not so much sword as small butter-knife...i have to tell you i was rather disappointed....but you on the other hand...well...those pants are not exactly loose fit and- oh! ...where the hell did all my pure thoughts go?! ...damn you, jack!

Jack Sparrow: As I said... Persuade me.
Translation: Sword?...when the hell did will grow a sword?...and when the hell did he learn Elizabeth to handle it?!...i'll cut it off the next time i see him!

[Elizabeth walks away frustrated, leans on the ship's railing]
Translation: If he sees me smiling now he is going to know how big Will's sword really is...

[Jack makes an odd grunting noise]
Translation: I'm sure she can see my sword right about now...

[Norrington walks up to Elizabeth at the railing]
Translation: Lets see if she actually notices me for once by saying something utterly annoying!

Norrington: It's a curious thing. There was a time when I would've given anything for you to look like that while thinking about me.
Translation: Instead of that sour look of distaste across your face...cow.

Elizabeth Swann: I don't know what you mean.
Translation: Can you not see that sour look of distaste across my face?

Norrington: Oh, I think you do.
Norrington: Lizzie and Jack, sitting in a tree; K-I-S-S-I-N-G !!!!!!

Elizabeth Swann: Oh, don't be absurd. I trust him, that's all.
Translation: I swear to god i thought i heard him singing then!

Norrington: [laughs, begins to depart, pauses near the mast] So you never wondered how your *latest* fiancé ended up on the Flying Dutchman in the first place?
Translation: Or do you need me to spell it out for you?

[Elizabeth looks at compass, then looks to where it is pointing...at Jack]
Translation: Ah well...its not like i needed to look to know where it was poiniting in the first place...like the sexual chemistry isnt noticeable, even in the first bloody movie!

..... the end 🙂

I just laughed obscenely hard and woke people up. that was HILARIOUS and completely SCANDALOUS.... 😄

OMFG LMAO!! great stuff!

Liz: Jack's compass? What does Beckett want with that?
Translation: Jack gets more interesting everytime i hear about him.

Will: I don't know.
Translation: Why do you sound so interested in him?!

Liz: Where will you find him?
Translation: Cause maybe I will get out of here and find him first...

Will: I'll start in Tortuga and won't stop till I find him.
Translation: I'm so glad you aren't coming on this trip, cause Tortuga isn't exactly the spot for couples.

Gov Swann: No. We must find our own way to secure your freedom. Just because you would risk your life for Jack Sparrow does not mean he would do the same for you.
Translation: If this whelp hurts my daughter, I'll pop him one. And Elizabeth is sounding way too interested in this Sparrow.

Liz: I have faith in you. Both of you.
Translation: You're hott. Jack's hotter.

Will: I intend to return and marry you.
Translation: If I dont make this happen soon, you're going to slip away from me.

Liz: Properly?
Translation: Just in case we need a fast annullment...

Will: Legally if you'll still have me...
Translation: Luckily in 1600s, a legal marriage means you are my property.

Liz: If it weren't for these bars I'd have you already.
Translation: All that talk about Jack put me in the mood.

Will: Keep a weather eye on the horizon...
Translation: Stay here and knit while I try to be manly...

Sorry if someone has said this already:

Jack: My compass is unique
Translation: I'm the best **** out there Liz..

LMAO nice one! 🙂
ooh i love reading these! 🙂

From movie 1, when Jack just put his handcuffs around Lizzie's neck...

Jack: I knew you'd warm up to me. Commodore Norrington my effects please. And my hat. Commodore!
Translation: I just needed to get her a little closer so she could get the full effect. Norrie, I am closer to your love than you'll ever be! Nah-nah-nah-nah!

Norrie: (hands the stuff to Lizzie)
Translation: If it's the last thing I do, I'll kill this man.

Jack: So its Elizabeth is it?
Translation: If it's the last thing I do, I'll seduce this woman.

Liz: It's Ms. Swann.
Translation: If it's the last thing I do, I'll seduce this man.

Jack: Ms. Swann, if you'll be very kind. Come come dear we don't have all day.
Translation: Maybe I could sneak a kiss or two. Gee, i bet we don't have time for any real fun.

Jack: Easy on the goods darling.
Translation: Be careful where you put those hands. Once you get a taste of me, no other man will measure up.

Liz: You're despicable.
Translation: How can someone look so sexy wet and dirty?

Jack: Sticks and stones, love. I saved your life, you saved mine. we're square.
Translation: Oh, yes talk dirty. I think we should trade favors more often.

Someone needs to do the deleted scene from 1 where Jack is showing lizzie his scars... 🙂

we are going to have to rate our translation. its pretty riske. LOL.

LOL! who cares ! iys hilairous!

i agree...no complaints here, and im prolly 1a the youngest ppl on this sight🙂

ditto!

"Gibbs: Beckett wants the Compass. Only one reason for that.
Translation: He's lost his own..."-----T. Maria. Brilliant! Loved it. Hmm. What hasn't been done?

First movie
Liz: But you were marooned on this island before!
Translation: That means you know the best place for our romp.

Jack keeps retracing his steps
Translation: I know I left that condom somewhere.

Liz: So we can escape the same way you did!
Translation: Although I don't know why I'm in such a hurry.

Jack: To what point and purpose, young miss. Unless you have (stuff) hidden in that bodice.
Translation: Man, I wish there was jello in that bodice. J-E-L-L-O

Liz: But you're Captain Jack Sparrow! You (did all these great things). How did you escape last time?
Translation: And feel free to take as long telling it as you want.

Jack: Last time I was here a grand total of 3 days, all right? The rum runners used this island for their hold and I bartered passage off. It seems they abandoned it since. You probably have your friend Norrington to thank for that.
Translation: Wouldn't you rather just get naked now?

Liz: So that's it then? That's the secret? You spent three days lying on a beach drinking rum?
Translation: That is so hot! Seduce me more.

Jack: Welcome to the Caribbean, love
Translation: Once you go Jack, you don't go back.

HAHAHAHA once you go jack... thats HILARIOUS.... 🙂 YAYAYAYY!!!

Btw, im on the edge of my seat for ch. 5 of the fan fic...lol

keep going with the translations!!!! 🙂

HAHA luv it! J-E-L-L-O!!! haha thats how im saying jello now! im onna spell it out! 😄

i love the "Oh, suits you sir!" thing under your pic, T.Maria. that vid was lmbo funny!!!! i was like rofl literally!!"Stop! Will you just build me a f***in' suit!"

Originally posted by ivebeendepped43
i love the "Oh, suits you sir!" thing under your pic, T.Maria. that vid was lmbo funny!!!! i was like rofl literally!!"Stop! Will you just build me a f***in' suit!"

😛 lmao!!!

In the words of Captain Jack Sparrow;

I couldn't resist, Mate... 💃

He must have really had some fun shooting that little sketch 😄

POTC1:

Gibbs: Leverage says you....I think i feel a change in the wind says I....
Translation: Speaking of wind......

When Will is going on to the dutchman:

Jack Sparrow: So what's your plan?
Translation:I'm hoping you don't have one...

Will Turner: I row over, search the ship until I find your bloody key.
Translation: Because as usual, i follow through every plan you tell me to even though i know full well that they only end up getting me into more bloody trouble!

Jack Sparrow: And if there are crewmen?
Translation: Please let there be crewmen...please let their be crewmen...

Will Turner: I cut down anyone in my path.
Translation: Because I laugh in the face of danger!...and then i hide until it goes away...

Jack Sparrow: [turns to Gibbs] I like it. Simple, easy to remember.
Translation: He's gonna die...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA that one was great!!!!!! 🙂 YAYAYAYAYAY!!!!!

From the scene where Jack, Will, and some of the crew visit Tia Dalma for the 1st time...

Jack: Tia Dalma!
Translation: I was hoping you wouldn't be at home.

Tia: Jack Sparrow. I always knew one day the wind would blow ye back to me.
Translation: I always knew you would want to see me in nothing but whipped cream again.

Jack: (smiles uncomfortably)
Translation: I really hope she doesn't get out the whipped cream...

Tia: You! You have a touch of destiny about you William Turner.
Translation: Who is this hottie with a body? How can I get him in bed?

Will: You know me?
Translation: I hope you're not the one from the last time i got really drunk...

Tia: You want to know me...
Translation: Unless you already have, which is entirely possible. I'm so forgetful of faces.

Jack: There'll be no knowing here. We've come for help and we're not leaving with out it.
Translation: Definately no whipped cream tonight. The sooner we figure out what Tia is trying to say through that accent, the sooner we can leave.

Tia: WHat is it you need? You know I demand payment.
Translation: Stop looking at my black teeth. I might get you into the sack yet.

Jack: I brought payment. Look. An undead monkey. Top that.
Translation: No Jack in the sack this time, lady. Have a monkey instead.

Tia: The payment is fair.
Translation: Oh crap. I guess that means no Jack in the sack this time. Boo.

Will: We're looking for this...
Translation: For some reason, Jack needs this, and we are all pretty much his slaves helping him find it.

Tia: The compass ye barter from me... it cannot take you to this?
Translation: Did you break my compass, Jack? Or did the warranty run out??

Jack: Maybe. WHy?
Translation: Crap. Caught.

Tia: Ah! Jack Sparrow does not know what he wants. Or do you know, but are loathe to claim it as your own?
Translation: He SO wants me. Or maybe he wants that **** from the vision- Will's girl. Haha, now he will know what it feels like to SUFFER...

Originally posted by T.Maria
I'll try...the 'persuade' me scene....

Gibbs: Beckett!
Translation: The little ponce in the wig...

Elizabeth Swann: Yes, they're signed, Lord Cutler Beckett of the East India Trading Company.
Translation: The arrogant little ponce in the wig...

Jack Sparrow: Agh.
Translation: I had a wig like that, once...

Gibbs: Will was working for Beckett, and never said a word.
Translation: The little arrogant ponce in the wig AND the whelp...its like a double act gone wrong!

Jack Sparrow: Agh.
Translation: I was a eunich in a wig...once....

Gibbs: Beckett wants the Compass. Only one reason for that.
Translation: He's lost his own...

Jack Sparrow: Of course. He wants the chest.
Translation: What i would give for a chest right now...I wonder if Elizabeth would protest if i stuck my head between hers....

Elizabeth Swann: Yes, he did say something about a chest.
Translation: I wonder if jack would protest if i stuck his head between mine right now....

Gibbs: If the company controls the chest, they controls the sea.
Translation: Why cant I have a chest to put my head between?

Jack Sparrow: A truly discomforting notion, love.
Translation: I'd watch it if i were you Elizabeth....Gibbs hasn't had any in a while....

Gibbs: And bad. Bad for every mother's son what calls himself a pirate. I think there's a bit more speed to be coaxed from these sails. Brace the foreyard!
Translation: I'm off to find myself a chest....Even if it is a mans....

Jack Sparrow: Might I inquire as to how you came by these?
Translation: I need to find an exuse to talk to you on your own now that Gibbs has done a runner.

Elizabeth Swann: Persuasion.
Translation: Did that sound too forward?

Jack Sparrow: Friendly?
Translation: Did she just sound forward, or is it just me?

Elizabeth Swann: Decidedly not.
Translation: No... don't be ridiculous, if i wanted to sound forward i would have said 'you, me and a bottle of rum in your cabin in two minutes...and bring your pistol...and i don't mean the one on your hip...'

Jack Sparrow: Will strikes a deal for these and upholds it with honor. Yet you're the one standing here with the prize. Full pardon, commission as a privateer on behalf of England and the East India Trading Company. As if I could be bought for such a low price.
Translation: Yes...thats it....keep talking fast enough for her not to realise you are mentally undressing her....is it odd i find her utterly ravishing in those mens clothes?....i think i have been around men for too long....

[Jack tucks the Letters into his coat and begins to walk away]
Translation: Pide-piper style...let her do the chasing....

Elizabeth Swann: Jack, the Letters, give them back.
Trabslation: Jack, the letter, let me dive into your coat and get them...hoping you have put them further south than i originally thought you did....

Jack Sparrow: No. Persuade me.
Translation: No...come and get them...i think you'll be surprised as to where i've really hidden them...

Elizabeth Swann: You do know Will taught me how handle a sword.
Translation: Well...not so much sword as small butter-knife...i have to tell you i was rather disappointed....but you on the other hand...well...those pants are not exactly loose fit and- oh! ...where the hell did all my pure thoughts go?! ...damn you, jack!

Jack Sparrow: As I said... Persuade me.
Translation: Sword?...when the hell did will grow a sword?...and when the hell did he learn Elizabeth to handle it?!...i'll cut it off the next time i see him!

[Elizabeth walks away frustrated, leans on the ship's railing]
Translation: If he sees me smiling now he is going to know how big Will's sword really is...

[Jack makes an odd grunting noise]
Translation: I'm sure she can see my sword right about now...

[Norrington walks up to Elizabeth at the railing]
Translation: Lets see if she actually notices me for once by saying something utterly annoying!

Norrington: It's a curious thing. There was a time when I would've given anything for you to look like that while thinking about me.
Translation: Instead of that sour look of distaste across your face...cow.

Elizabeth Swann: I don't know what you mean.
Translation: Can you not see that sour look of distaste across my face?

Norrington: Oh, I think you do.
Norrington: Lizzie and Jack, sitting in a tree; K-I-S-S-I-N-G !!!!!!

Elizabeth Swann: Oh, don't be absurd. I trust him, that's all.
Translation: I swear to god i thought i heard him singing then!

Norrington: [laughs, begins to depart, pauses near the mast] So you never wondered how your *latest* fiancé ended up on the Flying Dutchman in the first place?
Translation: Or do you need me to spell it out for you?

[Elizabeth looks at compass, then looks to where it is pointing...at Jack]
Translation: Ah well...its not like i needed to look to know where it was poiniting in the first place...like the sexual chemistry isnt noticeable, even in the first bloody movie!

..... the end 🙂

OH THANK YOU....THANK YOU....FOR MAKING ME LAUGH TODAY...I REALLY NEEDED A LAUGH...YOU ARE A DELITE...THIS IS ABSOLUTELY HYSTERICAL...I'LL NEVER BE ABLE TO WATCH THESE SCENES AGAIN WITHOUT LAUGHING....I WISH I HAD TIME TO POST ONE OF THESE...BUT TOO BUSY THESE DAYS...MAYBE THIS WEEKEND.