The General Discussion Thread

i consider my sister an asker..ai privileged daughter (whom i am trying to accept at the moment, but still hard after revealing to me she was expected to get a new car before she quit the shop back in february(or whenever it was))

a father who's willing to give his kids shit (finacially) make me sound spoiled, don't get me wrong, i hear it. (i am(if i asked for it)). I don't do that, i know i don't deserve anything. I'm such a funking whiner (****)!

jesus crhist, wtf am i crying about

so my father has a new gf.. year in x

he's a *****.. i am too. i know where i get my bitchiness from. but this ***** gf she put up a good front to begin with

4 times divorced... times divorced is giving me some caution here... like i said, i don't really talk to my family, especially about personal shit (their fault), (i am emotionally retarded ) (no love) (it's a thing, i believe). But she's running all over him, she has a big family, forcing her family on him, and he's accepting it without hesitation. He was with my mother for 30+ year.... never did he care to spend time with her family

drinking was a problem* - when he was with my mother. she never drank at home... every Thursday she had a drinking night at her mother's who passed ... last year? Yeah... my connection with my family is faltering. Not that is was ever there, just i felt like was the one to fake, to be there for everyone...mom, dad sister... not really sister. but i always felt an expectation from me, meaning in a sense, they wanted me to be someone rather than see who i am.

this is a good diary entry i must say. thank you kmc. i appreciate this.

i feel like i really need to get this off my ball/chest/ and dick

it's really just chest and head... thought i could be funny... mean nothing though... fyi coke'ing.... this shit ain't too bad. Until tomorrow, imma feel it then. Thank god (no, government?**** them too, at least we took 1 of the 2 days off cause we cheap ****ers... no work monday!

I'll take sine PMs after this cause i think i'm being... something?

i'm having fun.. i wanna thank you again kmc

for being nothing anymore

your days are over... we losers are keeping you somewhat alive. Even the mods are out the etcs are out.. it's just us ppl!

i'm just here for tonight tbh probably.. i come like every time i get ****ed!

i still get ****ed quite often... dk if i'm an alcoholic... i mean i am , but like don't make me feel bad about it, i'm still cool for the most part

like i do it to enjoy the things i wanna enjoy doing.. reading, gaming, lego'ing... uhm, ppl, not that i enjoy them but to embarras myself to them to make them feel like a better person than me (yes i do it for them) (obvioudly) (jk, im just ****ed up, thanks) (will i ever get better? (what is better?) (not not enjoy myself) (to give this idea to how a person should be acceptable to society) (when the **** was society on my side) (why would i do anything for them) (i am here for me) (and whoever is willing to accept me) (i don't think i'm a bad person) (i accept) (i love) (i just don't socialoize, so leave me the **** alone) (but i love you)

i love you all

this place (did) give me love

and i appreciate this place