Link vs. The River

Originally posted by ScreamPaste
Busy knobbin' yer mawm. estahuh

Originally posted by NemeBro
I sometimes wish your head was a gerbil.

^ Thread successfully trashed.

Originally posted by ScreamPaste
So does she, experimental woman.

If it was, I would take it, and dislocate my own jaw, so that the gerbil would be able to sleep soundly in its socket.

Such tender love for rodents is rare. I offer you a tip of the hat, and some mouthwash, incase of feces.

I have crossed this river before. Someone in Link Xat named one of their people MooCow of Justice. I completed the journey as the only survivor, supplied with no more than all the bacon we could carry.

Originally posted by MooCowofJustice
I have crossed this river before. Someone in Link Xat named one of their people MooCow of Justice. I completed the journey as the only survivor, supplied with no more than all the bacon we could carry.

Nope. WaffleZ. Real guy.

NOTHING CAN FORD THE RIVER

INCORRECT! I AM THE RIVER'S SUPERIOR!

You're too heavy and slow.

Fat people float better.

But your amazing cow fat is too dense.

Originally posted by MooCowofJustice
I have crossed this river before. Someone in Link Xat named one of their people MooCow of Justice. I completed the journey as the only survivor, supplied with no more than all the bacon we could carry.

Either you're lying, or the river took pity on your pathetic life.

Also, doubt you got to the end of the game without dysentery. Or getting raped by snakes.

I've never played Oregon trail. Always thought it was stupid.

I have however been a friend's character. And in this game I was the only survivor.

Your character's life was pathetic, so the River took pity on him.

Quite impossible. I had all the bacon I could possibly eat.

Which means you're fat, which means you are pathetic and have no life.

Your character, anyway.

Also quite impossible. Horses do not live forever. At some point, I walked.

Stop lying.