this is eerily familiar to what i went through with my gf. and for all those who dont get the underlying message to everything, former lovers dont make good friends. i know this, ush knows this, even if you enjoy being with them and just having fun with them, you cant help but look at them and see the person who broke your heart. its nearly impossible to be friends after a break up.
Snap!! that story is so great I think I might just pretend you guys lived happily ever after. I don't want to know what comes next. She's a cute girl and I don't want to be mad at her when she breaks your heart. Want ....to...stay...away...but...can't. I can't believe that American did that to her...dumb americans. 🙂 By the way, you have a great gift for telling a story Ush. I'm really impressed. Thanks for sharing.
The thing is... really... it could never have ACTUALLY worked. We could not have, in any practical way, carried on like that and gone on and on and on until we got married, or something. There was just too much still to be sorted out in our lives; FAR too many barriers in the way of us actually being together even if we were really suited for each other in a proper long-term relationship, which is not 100% certain. And she and I both had certain problems with many things relationship-wise which, frankly, were never going to be solved whilst together.
The ARSE of it is how we aren't even friends now and Edna no longer wants contact with anyone here, as Raz said earlier. That is the real shame but I must certainly take my share of the blame- the larger part. But even THAT was probably the best way for things in a way; especially for me. Not now though; now it has been too long and I am dashed lonely.
As for Nathan, though... if you do not mind me being selfish for a moment (and after that summer I felt justified in doing so), he actually left things in a better state than when he came in- not only for the romantic burst we had in coming back together again, but also in that he wiped out Elle's relationship with Dave- and I had to bear NO guilt for it whatsoever because I had not done a thing. Like I say, selfish, but you can see why by the time we had gotten back together again I was looking at Nathan as not SO bad a thing after all.
I HOPE she will; she nearly did once before so it CAN happen, especially if she ever gets bored again.
As for me telling this story... she would be very upset if I tried to cover up my own inadequacies in it, I am sure. Other than that... she might not like me telling it, I do not know, but in the end I feel no reason why to not simply tell the truth about things; I am not being bitter or resentful in any way, is the important bit.
Well... I don't mean conformist, Phoe... I meant that I no longer felt like an ostracised outcast. Being ill for so long and being mostly confined to my room does that. The outside world terrifies me but walking around arm in arm with Elle suddenly made it all seem understandable and bearable, you see?
Well. I shall work on getting the links and old mails and texts (I kept them all) for part 4 today and see if I can get it posted tonight or tomorrow.