There are three blonds stuck on an island and one day one of the blonds found a magic bottle a magic genie suddenly whooshed out you have 3 wishes. The blonds talked amongst them self’s soon they decided to share the 3 wishes.
The first blond walks up to the genie and said “I wish I was smart enough to get off this island’’ *puff* she turns to a brunet and builds a raft and sails off the island. The second blond walks up to the genie and said “I wish I was smart than her to get off this island” *puff* and she turns into a red head and builds a boat and gets off the island. The final blond goes up to the genie and said “I wish that I was smarter than both of them so I can get off this island” with a puff of smoke the genie disappeared and the blond turned into a man and crossed the bridge off the island.
Random Joke Thread
An old man sits on his front porch and his son comes out of the house with a roll of Duck tape. The Father looks at his son and asks him
“Where are you going wit that Duck tape?”
The boy tells him “I’m going duck hunting”
He tells his son “you can’t go duck hunting with duck tape”
The boy goes out and several hours later he returns with a bunch of dead ducks in tow. The next day the father is on the front porch and his son comes out. This time with a cat in his arms.
“Where are you going with that cat?” He asks
“I’m going out fishing for cat fish” the boy says
He tells his son “you can’t catch cat fish with a cat”
The boy goes out and several hours later he returns with a bucket full of cat fish. The next day the father is on the front porch and his son comes out. This time he is carrying a bunch of plants.
The father asks “what are those?”
The son tells him “pussy willows”
“Hold on son let me get my coat”
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A White guy, a Black guy and an Asian guy are trapped on the side of a mountain after a plane crash. As they are trying to make a camp the Asian finds a magic lamp and the three rub it. A Genie pops out and tells them “Since I can only grant three wishes I will grant one wish to each of you. What do you want my masters” all three reply “to get off this mountain” the Genie says “Fine, just jump off the side of this mountain and call out the name of what you would like me to change you into so you can get off the mountain and it will be done.”
The Asian Guy jumps off and yells out Bird! And he is changed into a bird and flys away.
The White Guy jumps off and yells out Eagle. He is changed into an eagle and flys away.
The Black guy jumps off and yells “Oh shit!”
RANDOMNESS
Yo mama jokes
Yo mama's so fat/old, when god said let there be light, he had to get your mom to move her big ass out of the way
Yo mama's so stupid, she tried to commit suicide out a basement window
Yo mama's so fat, when i slap her butt i can ride the waves
Yo mama's so fat she broke her leg and gravy poured out
Yo mama's so fat her blood type is chocolate fudge
Yo mama's so poor, when i went to your house for dinner she said how many peas do u want i said one she said damn you're greedy!
Yo mama's so fat, the only time she sees 90210 is on the scale.
Use Search...this has been done so many times.
yo mamma's so ugly, people go as her for haloween
Yo mama so stupid she sits on the TV, and watches the couch!
Yo mama so fat when she goes to an amusement park, people try to ride HER!
Yo mama so fat she's got more Chins than a Hong Kong phone book!
Yo mama so poor she drives a peanut.
Yo mama so ugly she made an onion cry
The latest joke my Grandma told me!
This one is for all you Disney fans.
Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time , which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little,which made him rather frail, and with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath.
This made him....(Oh, man, this is sooo bad, it's good)....are you ready?
This made him a Super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.
Re: The latest joke my Grandma told me!
Originally posted by Tired Hiker
This one is for all you Disney fans.Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time , which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little,which made him rather frail, and with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath.
This made him....(Oh, man, this is sooo bad, it's good)....are you ready?
This made him a Super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.
Ur gr4ndm4 1s f*ck1ng 0ld sk00l, bizz4atatch!!111
A good joke, but i heard that one like 4 years ago 😐
here's one you can tell your grandma, Tired Hiker:
A woman goes into the doctor's office and says, 'Doctor, you have to help me...I've got this problem: You see I can't stop farting. I fart all the time, only they are silent and don't stink. As a matter of fact, I've farted 20 times just now while talking to you.'
The doctor fills out a prescription and tells the lady, 'here, take these and come back in a week'.
So she leaves and a week later comes back to the doctors office. 'Doctor, doctor you must help me! Now things are worse. I'm still farting all the time, they are still silent but now they smell something awful. You must do something! What were those pills you gave me?'
The doctor replied, 'Oh don't worry, those pills where just to fix your sinus condition, now we'll work on your hearing problem.'
Originally posted by Council#13
A good joke, but i heard that one like 4 years ago 😐here's one you can tell your granny, Tired Hiker:
A woman goes into the doctor's office and says, 'Doctor, you have to help me...I've got this problem: You see I can't stop farting. I fart all the time, only they are silent and don't stink. As a matter of fact, I've farted 20 times just now while talking to you.'The doctor fills out a prescription and tells the lady, 'here, take these and come back in a week'.
So she leaves and a week later comes back to the doctors office. 'Doctor, doctor you must help me! Now things are worse. I'm still farting all the time, they are still silent but now they smell something awful. You must do something! What were those pills you gave me?'
The doctor replied, 'Oh don't worry, those pills where just to fix your sinus condition, now we'll work on your hearing problem.'
That joke is so old. I read that in the random comments thread like five minutes ago. 😛