Wacky Story thread (helpers needed!!)

Here's how it goes: you develop a story with many people, but write a paragraph and let somebody else continue the story. I'm sure there's been one of these before, but they're hillarious if the right stuff happens. Just before you start writing, post that you're writing the next part so three people don't write the next bit at the same time 🙂

I'll start:
It was a windy day in the desert. A lone man walks farther and farther, with sand as far as the eye can see. He was banished for eating bread on a Wednesday. As he approaches a hill, he sees a palm tree... but is it a mirage? He walks up further... and he sees....

A young bison grazing across the barin landscape. He walks closer and relizes it is actually there. He walks closer, many different thought going trough his mind...

a pizza stand. But not just any pizza stand. A vegetarian pizza stand. He runs the other way screaming. Only to figure out that he walked into small tall fat guy. he bounced off of him and flew all the way to...um...my house? yeah my house

then he got attacked by my crazy demented dogs and ran the other way all the way to boston. we pan away and a title fills the screen. "Lost in Boston", it reads.

He runs down the street and gets hit by a bus, but bounces straight backwards and hits a lampost. Seemingly uninjured, he gets up, brushes himself off, and walks away, when a tall black man comes up to him and says "free your mind, Bob. The Matrix has you"

"wtf?" bob asked. "i aint the in the matrix. hell what is the matrix."
"where u are," black guy says.
"no"
"yes"
"no"
"yes"

repeat a few times

😂

tall black guy leads the other guy who now revealed his name was uh,...jack, yeah jack, so he leads jack into this undeground building and tells him that he's in the matrix
guy : "you're in the matrix jack"
jack "no i'm not"

continues for several mintues

i thought his name was bob? oh well...hes jackbob now.

so black guy goes "dude. ur in the matrix."
Jackbob looks at black guy. "No im not. and who the hell are you, anyways?"
black guy stares. "You don't know who I am? I am the great, powerful..."

Will Ferrell. I am Will Ferrell. *random hand comes down in Monty Python style and says "hey, aren't you related to that--"* No, I'm not related to the Architect, god dammit! WHY DOES EVERYONE THINK THAT'S ME?! *silence*
Jackbob is confused beyond hell at this point. He then proceeds to exit, thinking he's in an insane asylum.. when someone blocks his exit.. that someone being..

Trinity the Monkey-LadY!!

darth vader. darth vader says, "luke, you are my father... wait a second, did i get it wrong again! DAMMIT! I'll get it right some day."
Vader looks at Jackbob. "Wait a minute, your not Luke. Sorry about that I'll catch you later i gess."
Jackbob stares at the closest window and hops out of it, only to find beneath him...

Chris Rock. He screams at Jackbob "You, kid, get me a coffee! AND DON'T SPIT IN IT!"
Jackbob runs off, scared, saying, "You're the boss, Mr. Rock!"
Chris Rock then says.. "No, you're the boss, and that's the problem!"
Jackbob gets a coffee, and on his way back, bumps into...

Trinity the Monkey-Lady?

Nuclear MisSILE man! Jackbob looks up in admiration as nuke man runs after his zamboni driving nemesis, whose name is...

Trinity! The! Monkey-Lady!!

um, yes. trinity the monkey lady. we see trinity being chased by nuclear misSILE man, only to realize that she had run over someone. but the person sprang back up and said, "hi, im..."

bill clinton. Bill clinton says "hey were you be gettin to wit tat dare coofay?"

jackbob:i'm bring it to mr. rock over there.
clinton:well you ain't anymore *grabs coffay mug*

jackbob gets pissed and chases clinton, but falls into a hole, where saddam hussien is hiding. "sweet" jackbob thinks. "now i can finally..."

..lose my virginity! He rapes Saddam and ends up killing him. "well, kill two birds with one stone" he says, but then he sees a shadow approach... only being....

take my coffe to mr.rock

*runs over to where mr.rock was standing*
rock is now gone and has been replaced with..