to spank or not to spank....that is the question

Storm I understand that I really do. But not all children are this way. Kids just aren't built the same and there is no specific formula for raising them. I think we all do what works for each of us.

Moose, I'm not even going to have this argument with you. You are trying to goad me into saying I have some kind of powertrip with my kids. Its simply not going to happen. There IS no powertrip and you can spout all the liberal parenting tips you can pull out of your mind, BUT I'm 43 Ive raised 2 kids through to adulthood and I did it MY way and they are fine. And the little one will be too. And not a damn one of them has "issues" with me. As I said before what works for one parent may not work for another. But the facts are right there in front of you. Kids today are waaaaaaaaaaay worse than they were back in the day and the ONLY people to blame for that are the parents and the liberal parenting. Period.

Originally posted by Samurai Guy
You concur with me for the most part?

Originally posted by Mane
has anyone yet clarified what is so physically and emotionally damaging about a swift pat on the butt?

Well, that depends on Who is giving that swift pat. Are you talking about a Parent that is about 350lbs applying the pat on the butt to a 3 year old?

oh please.......your weight has nothing to do with it. Its the amount of force behind the swat.

Originally posted by Mane
yeah i do. youre cool, just not CM.

Ouch, that hurts. Some useless meaningless doofus doesn't think I'm cool. I need to re-think my life now.

Originally posted by Jedi Priestess
oh please.......your weight has nothing to do with it. Its the amount of force behind the swat.

Originally posted by Jedi Priestess
oh please.......your weight has nothing to do with it. Its the amount of force behind the swat.

Originally posted by Linkalicious

what are you gaining by being calm? 😕
you were calm before, you were upset by your child, obviously you will attempt to calm yourself down before you repremand them. But what happens NEXT?

what happens when talking calm and reason doesn't work with a 6 year old?

I gain control by being calm and I act out reason NOT emotion. If talking and discipline a child doesn't work then there is something the kid is expericing that he/she is not telling you. Maybe you should pay more attention to his behavior. Because something is deffenetly going on inside that kid. You are the parent so is your duty to investigate.

Originally posted by Linkalicious

I agree with this as well, but what happens if they don't care about their tv or toy....what if all they want is what's in front of them at the time. And you saying no, is what causes them to have such tunnel vision?

That's an "IF". The reply above applies here too.

Moose, I'm not even going to have this argument with you. You are trying to goad me into saying I have some kind of powertrip with my kids. Its simply not going to happen. There IS no powertrip and you can spout all the liberal parenting tips you can pull out of your mind, BUT I'm 43 Ive raised 2 kids through to adulthood and I did it MY way and they are fine. And the little one will be too. And not a damn one of them has "issues" with me. As I said before what works for one parent may not work for another. But the facts are right there in front of you. Kids today are waaaaaaaaaaay worse than they were back in the day and the ONLY people to blame for that are the parents and the liberal parenting. Period.

Honestly, i'm not trying to goad you into anything.
congratulations on raising your kids as you see fit. I disagree with the techiques, and you probably did it the 'most correct' way possible, but with people like Mane spouting off his misinformed, juvenile retorts, it doesn't help YOUR arguments.
kids are worse than before, I agree, but that has more to do with the parents not doing what they should. There is a lot of APATHETIC parenting, not to be confused with "liberal" as you put it. I don't agree with corporal punishment just as you agree WITH IT. So be it. I'm not trying to say you are a bad parent, because I don't for one minute believe that.

well thank you for that.

there is a fine line between spanking and abuse, and if you spank out of anger, thats what i consider abuse. spanking out of love is what i call discipline.

Originally posted by Jedi Priestess
well thank you for that.

This was never about YOU or your abilities. Not for a second. It's about one's beliefs and own practices.

immature and ridiculous posts were angering me, and I realize now that that person is beneath me and not worth my time, and I apologize if you felt like I was juming on you.

Not jumping on me per se, more like trying to get me to feel bad about my parenting techniques is more the way it seemed.

Originally posted by WindDancer
I gain control by being calm and I act out reason NOT emotion. If talking and discipline a child doesn't work then there is something the kid is expericing that he/she is not telling you. Maybe you should pay more attention to his behavior. Because something is deffenetly going on inside that kid. You are the parent so is your duty to investigate.

That's an "IF". The reply above applies here too.

this whole scenario is about an "if"

you gain quick control of the situation if you show the child a little anger. Even if you don't actually hit them, but show them that what they've done has agrivated you...then they will fear any further gestures to heighten such anger.

tantrums are illogical emotional outbursts. Using logic against the illogical is like trying to open the eyes of a Bush supporter. It just won't work.

Originally posted by Jedi Priestess
oh please.......your weight has nothing to do with it. Its the amount of force behind the swat.

Is not about the weight is about that Image of a Bigger person trying to swat a child. Children record that in their minds. That's why Bullies exists, they are bigger so they beat the little kids. Using scare tactics to discipline the kid. Later on they fear bigger people.

i disagree. i believe bullies are created through abuse, not discipline.

I tallied the parents in my office, and out of the 8 that I asked (that was all that was available) 8 of them say there is nothing wrong with it.

I am using initials to protect anonymity. Here are my favourites.

1) JM -> I have only had to spank my daughters 2 times.

1-2-3 Magic. Do it once, and you never have to again.

2) MT -> There are alternatives. But there is nothing wrong with a tap on the bum.

3) MB -> We got it worse. They are getting off light with a spanking.

4) LJ -> It is better to physically hit them then belittle them verbally. "Stupid is a bad word in my house."

5) TM -> If you act up, you are getting punished.

Spanking does not scar a child for life. They will grow and understand.

Originally posted by Jedi Priestess
Not jumping on me per se, more like trying to get me to feel bad about my parenting techniques is more the way it seemed.

I wasn't trying to make you feel bad about being the parent you are.

Originally posted by Canadian Moose
Ouch, that hurts. Some useless meaningless doofus doesn't think I'm cool. I need to re-think my life now.

I think you are cool, Scottie! cheers

Originally posted by WindDancer
Is not about the weight is about that Image of a Bigger person trying to swat a child. Children record that in their minds. That's why Bullies exists, they are bigger so they beat the little kids. Using scare tactics to discipline the kid. Later on they fear bigger people.

Okay soooo you're saying that if a parent is big they should not spank there child?

That's asinine