Here's a new one:
Guardian
The wind whistles across
This empty, listless plain.
Leafless branches sway and dance,
Seeming to be in a world of pain,
Shrieking their pain with arms flailing,
Though no one can hear their agonized cries.
No one, that is, except for one lone woman
Standing amidst this barren wasteland.
Her intense blue eyes are the only
Part of her body that can be seen,
For she is robed from head to toe.
She is a solitary guardian to this place,
Where very few dare to venture.
Her robes, black as a moonless night,
Never so much as make a ripple,
Even though the wind is quite fierce.
They stay completely motionless,
Hiding the features of the woman,
Leaving her form all to imagination.
Her eyes never move a single inch,
Even though she should be on the watch;
They stare unblinkingly forward.
The sun sometimes shines directly in them,
But she is made of stronger stuff
And doesn't need to shade those cold eyes.
Her arms never leave their positions,
Held straight out from her body
To warn the few wary travellers.
They never shake with weariness,
She never brings them down to her sides;
Her strength is incredible indeed.
If a traveller should come upon her
They may be a little intimidated,
But she will not harm a single soul;
Her job is only to warn everyone away
From the dangers that lie ahead, though
She will let you pass, if you have the courage.
This woman has been dead for centuries,
But her statue will be forever watchful.
Originally posted by Coldfire
Here's a new one:Guardian
The wind whistles across
This empty, listless plain.
Leafless branches sway and dance,
Seeming to be in a world of pain,
Shrieking their pain with arms flailing,
Though no one can hear their agonized cries.No one, that is, except for one lone woman
Standing amidst this barren wasteland.
Her intense blue eyes are the only
Part of her body that can be seen,
For she is robed from head to toe.
She is a solitary guardian to this place,
Where very few dare to venture.Her robes, black as a moonless night,
Never so much as make a ripple,
Even though the wind is quite fierce.
They stay completely motionless,
Hiding the features of the woman,
Leaving her form all to imagination.Her eyes never move a single inch,
Even though she should be on the watch;
They stare unblinkingly forward.
The sun sometimes shines directly in them,
But she is made of stronger stuff
And doesn't need to shade those cold eyes.Her arms never leave their positions,
Held straight out from her body
To warn the few wary travellers.
They never shake with weariness,
She never brings them down to her sides;
Her strength is incredible indeed.If a traveller should come upon her
They may be a little intimidated,
But she will not harm a single soul;
Her job is only to warn everyone away
From the dangers that lie ahead, though
She will let you pass, if you have the courage.This woman has been dead for centuries,
But her statue will be forever watchful.
Maybe you should have written this in the form of a 'prose poem'. It's more like prose squeezed into some manner of verse.
Originally posted by Victor Von Doom
Maybe you should have written this in the form of a 'prose poem'. It's more like prose squeezed into some manner of verse.
Originally posted by Coldfire
Yeah I guess I could have done that... though I don't use that style very often *shrugs* But thanks for your imput; I'll think about maybe trying it that way 😊
It just seems to me if you are using a traditional poetry format without playing to its strengths, you could try a format which would be more suited to what you seem to be trying to do.
Originally posted by Victor Von Doom
It just seems to me if you are using a traditional poetry format without playing to its strengths, you could try a format which would be more suited to what you seem to be trying to do.