"The Vomitorium" - Reviews By KMC Members

Well, im sure alot of people will disagree with me on that one. Final Destination 3 has a five star because it is excellent in the horror genre. It is the sort of film you could watch over and over. Sky Captain & the World of Tomorrow is the same because it is as corny as FD3, popcorn entertainment. Jarhead is great for those who like war films, and Finding Neverland is good for those who like dramas.

I will be reviewing next: Fast & the Furious 3: Tokyo Drift, Ultraviolet, Superman Returns, Pirates of the Caribbean 2: Dead Man's Chest, Over the Hedge and Omen 666.

I have already done Fast & the Furious 3: Tokyo Drift & Ultraviolet. I have started Superman Returns review. I want to review them all so I can post them one after the other. So keep an eye for them. Should be done by next Friday.

Originally posted by Solo
You rated "Final Destination 3" better than "Finding Neverland", "Brokeback Mountain", "Jarhead", and "Sky Captain"?

Wow, I guess I better be seeing this.

No, he just doesn't know what he's doing.

Its Time I Nab A Few Bitchin' Reviews!!

Ghost World For Starters, Than We'll Take A Look At Sleepy Hollow, And Finish With The Exquisite Fifth Element! How Do You Like That Dementedde!!?? lol jk I Look Forward To Reading A Review To Omen 666 On Here Finally pfft X)

Ghost World: Why The **** Haven't You Seen This Yet
Ethan Reeser

Is There Really Any Need For A Review To This Movie? I Don't Think So. But I'll Write One Just On The Off Chance Someone Is Impaired Enough Not To LOVE This Movie.

The Movie Begins As Eccentrically As You Would Expect Any Terry Zwigoff Film To After Seeing His Almost-As-Bitchin' Crumb Waay Back There In 1994, The Beginning Of The Movie Sets The Hilarious, Exuberent And Ruthless Tone Of The Film Perfectly While Suddely Introducing The Lonliness And Sadness That Haunts The Main Character Enid, And To A Certain Extent Rebecca As They Look On The Rest Of The World With The Cruelty And Wit That Only A Teenage Girl Could.

As They Leave Highschool They Begin To Relize That Being An Adult Isn't As Good As Its Glammed Up To Be And They Both Deal With It In Their Own Unique Way, As Enid Stays At Home And Begins To Retreat In To Her Own World And Rebecca Thrusts Herself In To The Grown Up World, Getting A Job.

Through Various Hilariously Entertaining And At The Same Time, Hauntingly Sad Adventures They Begin To Grow Up In The End, Eventually Become A Part Of The World They Hated So Much, The Movie Radiates Exelence With Perfect Cinematogrophy, Quick Witty Dialogue, Memorable Characters And A Story Almost Anyone Could Identify With, Ghost World Shines And Is The Best Movie Of 2001, By Far.

Luc Besson Is Back, And With A Vengeance. In Releasing Leon: The Professional In 1994, Besson Was Given A Foot Hold In The Theatrical US Market, (One Which He Should Already Have Had With La Femme Nikita) With Which He Would Release His Next Vision In The Form Of 1997's Critically Acclaimed: The Fifth Element.

The Film Has Definitely Set A New Bar By Which Sci-Fi Films Are (Or Should Be Judged) Featuring Visual Effects Looking Far Ahead Of They're Time, With It's Living, Breathing, 31st Century-Abouts New York, Space Battles, And Of Course, The Absolutely Gorgeous Cruise Ship Aboard Which Is The Infamous: Diva, Played By Maïwenn Le Besco, His Ex Girlfriend 😮‍💨 . The Music, Composed By Eric Serra Has A Middle Eastern Tinge To It And Fits Perfectly With The Stunning Setting In Which The Film Takes Place, The Cinematography Is Rich And Vivid Without Becoming Overwhelming As Is So Often The Case With Sci-Fi Movies. The Story Is Great And Doesn't Take Itself To Seriously, With Some Parts Being Hilarious And Some Being Quite Moving, Its Also Hard To Tell What It Tries To Accomplish, But It Doesn't Matter, Because Whatever It Is Trying To Accomplish It Does It So Well, Its Worth Being Confused.

This Is Definitely The Best Movie Of '97 And By Far. Do Yourself A Favor, Go Down To Wal-Mart, And Pick Up The Ultimate Edition For A 10 Spot, Its Well Worth It With An Entire 2nd Disc Full Of Goodies, A Trivia Track And Oh Yeah. 5.1 Dolby Digital Sound With A Digitally Remasterd Superbit 2:35 Aspect Ratio Face Lift. XD Oh Joy.

Originally posted by Arachnoidfreak
No, he just doesn't know what he's doing.

Thanks alot! I always put positive and negative factors in my reviews, even though that should have been clear so obviously someone has been skipping paragraphs of my reviews! Read the FD3 review again and you will find some negative points of why you shouldn't watch the film and why some people might like it.

Originally posted by echud12345six
Its Time I Nab A Few Bitchin' Reviews!!

Ghost World For Starters, Than We'll Take A Look At Sleepy Hollow, And Finish With The Exquisite Fifth Element! How Do You Like That Dementedde!!?? lol jk I Look Forward To Reading A Review To Omen 666 On Here Finally pfft X)

I agree with you on The Fifth Element. I loved the soundtrack for it, got it in the house. I haven't seen Ghost World, it's been on television a few times but I keep missing it. Sleepy Hollow is really good. Amazing when I watched it in the theatres - 'Heads will roll' Ha! I love it. You didn't do a review for it though 🙁

Anyway, here is some reviews that I have seen in the theatres not that long ago.

THE FAST AND THE FURIOUS: TOKYO DRIFT ** (NOT BAD)

I heard rumours about Universal Pictures making the new Fast and the Furious 3 but I certainly wasn't expecting it to be out any time soon. Probably the biggest movie surprise for me for this summer! There wasn't that much advertisement for this at all, but then maybe that's what the creators wanted so they could surprise an unexpected audience within open arms. I remember when I first saw the trailer towards this, I thought it resembled the Fast and the Furious movies but I didn't catch on until those huge letters covered the big screen with the subtitle Tokyo Drift. I will be completely honest with you, I didn't like the last two films in this franchise. I personally think that these types of movies are for that single car-crazy guy who loves his films with sexy girls in bikinis and big engines! However, when I watched Tokyo Drift I was amazed to find that director Justin Lin have decided to take a different approach from the last two directors and actually try to create a storyline for this film! This is much different in a more darker tone rather than all that color and flash we're used to. Think of it like the Batman movies, the first two were the more gothic from Tim Burton and the other two were more colorful without the thinking cap, except picture this the opposite with Fast and the Furious fanchise. The darker tone won overall in the Batman films but would it work using the same method in this? Not really, and for you racer fans of this franchise will be even more disapointed.

The stripped down plot focuses on Shaun (a Lucas Black trying to fit Paul Walkers shoes but fails miserably), an outsider whose only passion remains illegal street racing. After destroying his and his opponents car in a messy American drag race which is a promising opening and is unfortunately the most pleasure your going to get from the car sequences, Shaun is shipped to Japan to live with his father in a beaten up neighbourhood. This is his last chance left, his mother couldn't handle him anymore the amount of times he has been in trouble, and if he screws up with his father than his only resort is prison. In a land famous for its modified racers, the simple street race has been replaced by the ultimate pedal-to-the-metal automotive challenge... drift racing (basically skidding your car around corners). After becoming attracted to the hot girlfriend of DK: The Japanese Drift King (who is a crime lord working for his father in a gang), Shaun ventures into the deadly realm of the Yakuza. Chaos ensues and a high-stakes drift-racing contest is arranged. So, we have a bit of romance when Shaun keeps talking to DK's girlfriend even when he has been threatened not to, and Shaun is being taught how to drift after making friends with a guy that he owes money to after accidently smashing his car up when he tried racing DK the first time. So, alot is going on for our young cowboy hero Shaun. But as usual the same old stuff happens, except in this we see alot more car chase scenes through mountains, car parks, main roads and construction sites that provides the odd thrill moment with some great stunts for the eyes to pop out in amazement. But then for those who are car racers probably wouldn't think too much of that. It did thrill me but it seemed to get a little repetitive as all we seem to stare at is cars drifting around corners and skimming other cars in the process. It's all been done before, except it is heavily used. Also the surprise ending somewhat feels that I have been cheated from my money. The car racers is just another way of Shaun defeating the gangsters, even though there are alot more death scenes in this (from cars crashing and exploding) it uses that for emotion and tries to hide the fact that all this film is just some popcorn entertainment. If you don't want to know what happens at the end then start reading the next paragraph NOW. We get a surprise camero from Vin Diesel (who co-starred next to Paul Walker in the original fast and the Furious) who races Shaun before the end credits appear. Before that, as he was the new DK, he challenged the original DK for a race, the loser has to leave town. Guess who won... Do you actually need to?

The acting is as corny as ever, perhaps even more than the other two movies. The main actor Lucas Black just didn't do it for me. I'm sure he isn't that bad of an actor if he was in a more serious film, but then it was his accent that just made me dislike him and wanted less film time of him in. Then, the guy who played DK was just as bad trying to give us that bad boy attitude with his eyes that seems to be a villains trademark in original Japanese films. He was more laughable than anything else all because of how badly he was acting it. The romance approach just didn't seem to go well with a type of film like this.

The whole film is cheesy. I didn't mind the first two so much simply because the directors were not hiding the fact that they were right from the start. But this director Justin Lin just had to tamper around with the films formula to try and give us a full blown storyline that is just no need for one. Making it more serious rather than fun. Yeah, there was the occasional joke that made me snigger but it just didn't cut it for me. Whats more it's even more cheesy than the other two in the franchise, but it stands out more simply because it tries to be intelligent.

I think this film is worth watching if your a big fan of the Fast and the Furious movies, but just don't expect it to be as good. In fact don't expect it to be anything like the first two films. This is more like a one-off, and the main guy Lucas Black will not do it for the ladies as Paul Walker and Vin Diesel did. Don't waste your money to watch this in the theatres. Instead wait for it to come out on rent, I think it would be worthy for that only because they introduce the new drift racing, but then that will be old and gone by the time you watched all of this.

THE OMEN *** (GOOD)

In 1557 Nostradamus predicted the rise of the anti-Christ who would destroy mankind. On the sixth day of the sixth month of the year 2006, his time will come. Plaguing the dreams of nearly everyone who has dared witness it, the legendary 1976 hit starred screen legend Gregory Peck and featured a petrifying soundtrack that rivaled The Exorcist. It remains one of the finest horror movies of all time. I remember when I was a child arguing with my parents that I would not be scared if I stayed up with them to watch it. From the chilling musical score in the beginning credits to the nerve shredding bit where Damian is fighting with his parents not to go to church, I then had to turn it off because I was scared. I then managed to conquer my fears a few years later when I found it back on television, it was a unsettling experience but I managed to watch all of it. I don't know why the boy who played Damian has not been mentioned as one of the most scareist villains in horror movies! There were a few horrific sequences in the film that stands out more than the rest of the film, and will surely stay with me for the rest of my life. However, Twentieth Century Fox has managed to get the rights from the original distributor Warner Brothers to chash in to make the remake. But how can you make a remake to an already perfect horror classic? It would be like having another director to remake George Lucas' Star Wars! You see now what I mean? But as you can tell from the rating I have given it, it was a pretty damn good movie. It lacked the suspense and grittyness of the original and replaced it with some really good scare tactics that had me really jumping out of my seat about twice which is an awfully lot compared to other horror films in modern cinema.

The plot of this updating finds the wife of an American ambassador Robert Thorn (Liev Schreiber) giving birth to a stillborn baby. Unbeknown to Katherine (Julia Stiles), Robert substitutes it for another newborn baby after being persuaded by some priests, who they call Damian and raise as their own. However, Robert keeps it to himself that Damian isn't really theirs and doesn't tell anyone including Katherine his secret. As their son grows up, however, strange accidents begin to take place around him, including the hanging of his nanny and the grisly death of a priest who tries to help the family as he knows the secret about Damian but gets rejected by Robert. Also, what's up with the strange woman (who is played by the main actress that starred in Rosemary's Baby) that takes over the last nannys job to look after Damian? Initially dismissing the talk as superstition from what has been happening recently, the diplomat gradually becomes convinced that his son is the Antichrist - the son of Satan who aims to preside over the Apocalypse. Marked with 666, the number of the anti-Christ and "mark of the Beast", is Damian the Devil incarnate or is his father just being paranoid? I think it's obvious what the answer of that is but it is still fun finding out through the carnage and some interesting dialogue. There is a twist at the end that wasn't in the original's, it leaves the film open for a sequel which I hope isn't going to be a remake of the dreadful Omen 2 if there ever was a sequel. I doubt it, haven't heard of one just yet but who knows with Hollywood these days. The twist at the end of the remake of Omen is... If you don't want to know then start reading the next paragraph NOW... When the Diplomat gets shot by the police whilst trying to stab Damian with daggers after finding out he has the birthmark on his scalp saying 666, it shows Damian at his funeral holding hands with the President. Damian will now be living with him!

Directed by John Moore (Behind Enemy Lines). If the doom and destruction isn't enough for you, the devilishly good cast could elevate this remake up to the lofty position of the original in horror fan's lists. The British pairing of Spielberg's favourite actor Pete Postlethwaite and Michael Gambon provide the heavyweight clout, while julia stiles and Liev Schreiber bring a hip sparkle to proceedings. I think the child is the only actor in this that I would say should of been given a role to someone that looks alot more scarier. This boy does do the job in the suspenseful parts that shows his evil expressions but I still think it should of been casted to someone that could of pulled it off alot better. But it doesn't really matter and can be forgiven.

Like I said earlier on, this film is higher on the jump tactitcs (that does work a treat) and the gore factor but unfortunately lacks the originals dark and gritty look that made it alot more suspenseful. There are still some creepy parts, like the black and white sequences that Liev's character dreams can be quite scary. One in particular that was shocking to me is when a bald man is giving a creepy smile to the audience dropping a dead baby in slow motion. I thought that was an excellent scene except for my critical friend that said it looked cheesy to him. Fans of the original Omen will appreciate this remake, nothing has really changed much and the stuff they have doesn't go too far away from the storyline and doesn't go on for long before it goes back on track. So, saying that you cannot except any new death scenes, maybe except for one when a Final Destination style accident so happens to blow up a car with the American ambassador causing Liev and his family to move house because he is going to be the next one! The death scenes are updated, though, so something refreshing and exciting is to see how modern special effects will bring in the yucks more violently, which does do the trick. I didn't know it was going to contain a lot of jumps, some can be predictable than others but it's best to watch it on the big screen since it will probably not be the same on your television.

I will definitely want to watch this again, maybe not so much that I will want to buy it but will always be a film that I could gladly say yes to watching again if I get offered the chance. True horror fans will delight this little film that stays true to the storyline and concept of the original. Except this time we get treated with some more convincing visual trickery, good scare tactics, and some good added scenes. The first half hour of it I will admit that I didn't enjoy at all and made me think I was going to stay the same way throughout the rest of the film. It's a shame that the more better scenes of the original was in the beginning of the film which they did a messy job of in the remake. However, director John Moore makes up for that by bringing in a few better scenes that they should of put in the original which brought a smile on my face. So if you could put up with the first half hour I promise you that you will then start to like this remake, but for those who haven't seen the original will probably like this all the way through. It's not the sort of film that girls will like as much, as people who have seen the original will know that it does take a while between each death scenes with all the dialogue. But thats what is good about this film; it focuses more on the storyline. Be sure to watch this in the cinema, if not then definitely rent it out when it comes in the rental stores.

OVER THE HEDGE ** (NOT BAD)

Dreamwork's previous 3-D offerings who created Shrek, A Shark's Tale and Madagascar were huge box-office smashes. Over the Hedge looks set to replicate their success, but with increased acclaim from cinemagoers and critics alike. I have always been a huge fan of 3D animation ever since Walt Disney's Toy Story stormed the cinemas, but these days I have realized that some of them I have watched have not been as good, and also there are just too many of them! I liked some of the Dreamwork's films, the ones I didn't like are Shrek (I'm sorry, I know loads of you out there really enjoyed this film but it just wasn't for me) and A Shark's Tale (a review is already up of this by me). Shrek 2 is my favourite, a major step-up from the original, and I really enjoyed Madagascar. All of these animated features have had a steller cast and beautiful visuals, and the ones I enjoyed were packed full of hilarious gags. Over the Hedge would have to be in my likeable list but would be further down the list, so in other words it just made it in. Again, the visuals are as incredible as ever with some very popular voice talents doing the work. It did make me laugh in some places, maybe not as much as I did in Madagascar, and the storyline came across as a typical Disney feature loaded with alot of adult gags that may not be suitable for children. But then again, can you remember the last animated feature that wasn't bombarded with adult jokes? Besides, all of Dreamwork's humour in their animated projects have always been like that so there is no surprise in Over the Hedge. This is probably something that you will enjoy more than other animated films this year but is definitely not the best project that Dreamwork's have come up with.

Over the Hedge follows a traveling raccoon con artist, RJ (Bruce Willis), as he arrives in some woods outside a city in the Midwest. Excited about the wonders of being near humans, RJ instead finds a timid community living in fear of people. Waking up after hibernating for five months through a cold winter, the gang walks into something they've never seen before - a tall green "thing" called a hedge. While they were napping, a developer has built homes over half their woodland. The animals slowly venture over the hedge and the rascal raccoon RJ shows them a "getway to the good life." This new world finds the humans - who live to eat, rather than eat to live - leaving tin cans full of food in dustbins, ripe for the taking. As they get closer to people, however, the animal's comfortable habitat in the woods appears to be threatened by an vermin exterminator who covers the horrid woman who hired him back garden with all sorts of nasty traps. RJ isn't helping these creatures that is lead by a paranoid turtle out of the kindess of his heart, but he is using them to gather the same food together that he owes to a homicidal bear that is giving him a few days to get back what the raccoon took and accidently destroyed of his. So, we pretty much see throughout the animals collecting food together so the raccoon can give back to the bear before his time is up, tricking the other animals by making them think their collecting food for the next Winter. However if I should carry on then I will be revealing some spoliers, so if you're satisfyed with what you have read already then start reading the next paragraph NOW or keep reading to find out more... Okay, so as the raccoon is getting help from a group of animals that likes to think of themselves as being part of a "family" he gets alot of stick from the turtle that is very suspicious over him and try to warn the others that he doesn't trust this raccoon but the others have already warmed to him. Through the film the raccoon starts getting doubts when he discovers the animals have fixed him a home by theirs and he starts getting caring for them. They manage to collect all the food together, but the jelous turtle accidently destroys all of it which makes him get hated by the other animals. It isn't long that the raccoon comes up with another plan on the night that the next day is the bears deadline. The plan is to go into the back garden that is full of traps set up by the exterminator, get into the womans house (the same one that hired the exterminator) and to raid her fridge. The turtle becomes friends with them all again after saying sorry and they start forming the plan to get all the food on the list in just one night! There is a little more to the story like when the raccoon gets found out for being a trator, but this is all I will leave you with and assure you that it is a happy ending for everyone except for the bad bear, the woman and the exterminator (who deserves what they get).

Synopsis aside, the voice cast has me positively salivating in anticipation. Joining Bruce Willis are a host of comedians (Anchorman and the 40 Year Old Virgin's Steve Carell), movie/TV-stars (Nick Nolte, Garry Shandling) and "Sk8er" Girl Avril Lavigne, making her big-screen debut and American Pie's dad Eugene Levy. There are a few good stars in this, Bruce Willis and Steve Carell has to be my favourite out of this bunch but the only thing is each voice actor doesn't get a fair share of voice time in this. It's basically between the raccoon and the turtle. With one minor exception of the scene stealing fox that is very hyper and most you will be laughing at will be him. All the rest of the characters will be forgotten about after you have watched the film, the only reason why the raccoon and the turtle will be remembered as well as the fox is because the storyline evolves around them.

Although the CG animation marketplace is more crowded this year with Ant Bully, Cars, Monster House and many more to come, Over the Hedge has got some potential but will have some stiff competition from the other childrens films to come. Sharing themes from Toy Story - cute little creatures scared of the human world, an old-fashioned grump against a charismatic daredevil - you can tell that it is from the same creators of Shrek by the humour that is contains that I wouldn't say made me laugh as loudly as Madagascar but certainly but certainly made me smile and chuckle quite often. The visual quality is just amazing, top notch effects will make this something marvelous to watch whilst eating with some scenes that just look so life-like that it is just so curious to know what the next few years of cinema will be like in this type of field. Over the Hedge is directed by Tim Johnson and Karey Kirkpatrick. I had a choice from this film to watch in the cinemas and the other one that looks remotely the same but has a premise that looks like a rip-off from Madagascar called The Wild done by Walt Disney. I think I made the better choice, but even this one shouldn't of been watched by me in the cinema. But then there is nothing really else for the children to watch, so I would say at the moment this is the excellent choice.

Loads of the jokes are for adults, though, and even some adults might not be able to get some jokes. Like when the creatures invade the annoying human womans house to collect all the food, one of them accidently sits on a remote control that sets off the television. On the screen comes the big words THX which if you're a big movie fan like me then you would know it's a George Lucas sound company that is supposed to give you the most clearest and loudest sound for your viewing pleasure. Well, when this comes on the screen the iconic theme for it is so loud that it blasts the creatures from one end of the room to the other. That made me laugh, but then for most of the others they didn't. Don't worry, the jokes are not like that all the way through and most of the time you will definitely laugh. But they are still aimed for the adults leaving the children to just stare at the eye candy and cute little creatures. I would say this is definitely worth a rent if you're into these animated features but maybe for the children it would be nice to take them to the cinema to watch it. It's not something to buy unless it's for a child.

ULTRAVIOLET * (TERRIBLE)

Launching The Fifth Element's super-babe Milla Jovovich back into the world of sci-fi is Ultraviolet; an stylish thriller set in the late 21st Century based off the manga comic books that apparantly has left so much out according to one of my friends, even though he is known to be a liar, and that it doesn't show the true colors of the comics. I didn't like this much at all and will have to say this is one of the worst sci-fi films I have seen in a long time and was really disapointed at what I was watching. Yes, it did have some good immaginitive sequences but that only happened quite rarely through the film with a storyline that is as boring as the cheesy dialogue. Also, when I mentioned the immagination part to this film, you probably realize I didn't mention the special visual effects. That's because the immaginitive sequences, as I have said, is a positive factor to this film (rarely) and the special visual effects are the complete opposite (frequently). When I watched Aeron Flux on rental a few weeks ago I was quite disapointed, but that was because I heard of the film before hand of watching it, with Ultraviolet I only remember seeing a poster for it so I didn't know what to expect.

Based on Independent film godfather John Cassavete's 'Gloria', the story is set in a furturistic world on the brink of civil war between the government and a subculture of disease-modified humans - in whom strength, speed and intelligence have been magnified. Caught in the crossfire is the infected Ultraviolet (Milla Jovovich), who finds herself the protector of a boy who have been marked for death by the under fire government. The first fifteen minutes or so shows Ultraviolet infiltrating the enemies headquarters with a false identity to pick up the briefcase that the government seems to be frantic about. That is before the actual persons who identity Ultraviolet was under comes to the base, and it isn't before long that Ultraviolet is fleeing the scene with all guns blazzing. She takes the case back to the small group of other infected people but not before she curiorsly opened it to find the young boy (I can't remember his name but I recognize him from the aweful film Godsend alongside Robert De Niro). She is now on the run from her side, as they have been given orders to kill destroy the boy, so she is on the loose with the seemingly handicapped boy and to find out why the government needs him so badly.

I don't really like Milla Jovovich is an actress, I find her very untalented that is only used in action films since it doesn't take that much acting and, of course, her body! She is hot, I remember her in The Fifth Element covered in white straps all over her body revealing snibbets of her flesh. She was also something in the Resident Evil movie, which I loathed so much but ended up finishing watching it only because she was in it and not because of the messy storyline. I think it was a break for the young boy starring in this, not only does he not got to say much but also his character doesn't need to have any expressions throughout the film. So this must have been a walk in the park for him, just a pitty he picked a bad film to do it in. Maybe they both could of been better, but it's just the terrible script that makes them laughable. Some of the one-liners will make you cringe.

The special visual effects don't look real at all. But maybe that's because the creators were not trying to make them real but more towards the manga comic visuals. That's what my friend said, you know, the one who is known as a liar. If that is true and I new that when watching it then I might have appreciated them a bit better but it is just way too over the top in high octane action sequences. Some of the action is good to look at, whilst other parts make it look like a B-movie. My personal favourite was the opening sequence that did look astonishing, fooling us in thinking it's gonna be good, and the bike sequence when she is driving up walls of buildings to get away from a helicopter. There are some good scenes that stick out but if I tell you about three more then I would of told you all of the best visuals in the film! Can someone tell me what is the deal with Milla's costume and hair changing color all the time!? It is never explained.

I would highly recomend Aeron Flux than this, that is if you're not a fan of the Ultraviolet comic books, because if you are then you might respect this a little more. I got a feeling that the comics explain hell alot more than what it does in Ultraviolet as I was clueless in some scenes of what's going on. I will probably watch this again, and might get this for a very cheap price on DVD when it has been out for a while in the stores. Only because of the better action scenes in this. But it's not the sort of film that you could just spend to watch in the theatres. Not even on rent as well! Wait until you get the opportunity to lend it off a friend, and watch it by your own so you won't have anyone nagging how bad it is. If you got other films lined up then it's best to watch them first. Keep this one as a last resort DVD, and if you don't like far fetched and over the top films then you will hate this.

MISSION:IMPOSSIBLE 3 *** (GOOD)

I wasn't too sure what to think of it when I heard they were bringing out a third Mission: Impossible to the franchise's equation. I will be honest in saying that I wasn't too fond on the original at all. I watched it once and decided instantly that I will never watch it again, not just because of the complex plot but also the minimum stunts it provided us with. The only thing I enjoyed was the theme tune, and maybe one or two stunts that I can always look again in the trailers as it's only those that have action through the film. I bought the sequel on video after watching it in the theatres. It had a more higher rating and was alot more darker making it more violent and suspenseful for the audience adding more stunts and cutting down on the storyline. I just couldn't see how they could make a third film in something that seems impossible to carry on with. The trailers didn't even make it look spectacular for me as well, and was the least action film this summer that I couldn't care if I watched in the theatres or not. That is until I read all the reviews for it; Loads of critics and all my friends have said how excellent it was. One of my friends in particular did not want to watch it, but was forced to in the end by his girlfriend and he came out saying that it was one of the best action films he has seen so far this summer. This got me all excited and in the end I forced my girlfriend to watch it in the theatres with me. It was good, but certainly not worth all the hype over. I felt guilty because my girlfriend didn't even like it, she was flinching through the long movie and we both came out with unsatisfyed expressions on our faces.

Phillip Seyomour Hoffman shows up here as a "scary, clever and mysterous" villain intent on causing destruction. We quickly learn Ethan Hunt's (Tom Cruise) feisty girlfriend (Michelle Monaghan) is top of the hit-list after the ruthless nemises proclaims: "Do you have a girlfriend? I'm gonna find her. I'm gonna hurt her. Then I'm going to kill you right in front of her." With the emotional stakes ramped up, Hunt is joined by the gun-toting Keri Russell and Simon Pegg. In his battle to conquer his newfound nemises, Hunt is chased from Washington to Shanghai. To put the premise in more detail, we see Ethan Hunt finally settling down with his girlfriend, but that is until he secretly accepts a mission from the old gang at the aggency to infiltrate a building and rescue a spy that has been taken hostage that a group of terrorists have seized. The reason why Ethan accepted the mission is only because the hostage is a girl who he cares for and have had a chemistry with back in he olden days. He must act fast as a little bomb has been planted in her head, after a amount of time that bomb will explode! Cue some action sequences that is the first in the film, and isn't the most impressive if I might add, but Ethan doesn't manage to save her before the time runs out. So now it is getting personal. The leads that Ethan has got is the Phillip Seyomour Hoffman's character that is known to be a invisible ghost towards the government and is one of the most wanted men. That is just half the premise, but if I carry on then I think it would spoil the experience for you to find out for yourself, so if you don't want to read anymore of the story then start reading the next paragraph NOW. In the beginning before the opening credits appear we see Ethan Hunt captured by the villain and is given ten seconds to say everything he knows or his girlfriend seated and tied next to him will get shot! Surprisingly his ten seconds are over without giving any information as he claims he doesn't know anything. So we see his girlfriend getting shot and the film time after that is going back in time before that event happens. It's a smart way of doing it as we see incidents happen that answers our questions when we hear the villain and Ethan going on about it in the beginning. There is a twist of what happens to Ethan's girlfriend, however, one that fans would have probably clicked on by already. If you don't want to know then skip this paragraph to the next NOW. It wasn't Ethan's girlfriend, it was someone with a mask looking like her giving Ethan another chance to save his girlfriend.

With his Lost and Alias proving to be dazzling and downright entertaining small-screen fare, J.J. Abrams is a great choice to bring the third film of this billion-dollar franchise. Character is the key this time around with Abrams detailing how a 'superspy's' work can mentally affect him by throwing up questions like: "How does a man live his life undercover?" Ving Rhames reprises his memorable turn as Hunt's right-hand man Luther Stickell. Rhames is joined by Laurence Fishburne, Billy Crudup and Brit thespian Jonathan Rhys-Meyers. Tom Cruise is on top form as Ethan Hunt as he has done most of the stunts by himself without a stunt double which you can tell in some of the scenes, but yet there is some cheesy dialogue yet to be heard especially from the funnyman Simon Pegg (that even though I respected him in Shaun of the Dead I will say that he was just too corny in this). Phillip Seymour Hoffman plays a different kind of villain, showing that he is villainous but yet has a calm voice throughout the whole film. It's something new that I haven't seen before which he pulls off nicely, but I won't say he's the most evil villain I have seen. Far from it! He doesn't really die a inventive death at the end, in fact not many people do in this.

There is the famous implausibly realistic masks that Ethan wears again that looks identical to the person he is pretending to be. It isn't used too much in the film as well which is a good thing. Also self-destructing instructions is used very infrequently in this again making room to try out new things. However, some of the new things are not as good as the originals. Like the remake of the Mission Impossible theme tune for example, not as good as the originals. Also the action sequences are not as good as what people make them out to be. The only one that I liked so much was when the villain finally gets caught by Ethan Hunt and is transported to a security prison. On the bridge going over the sea, it is sabotarged by a group of mercenaries that try to free the villain and bring him to safety. There are some good action scenes on that but as for the others just seem like they have cheated us. I mean, the helicopter chase sequence could of been much better after Ethan rescues that hostage from the building only to find out he is too late to stop the bomb going off inside her head: The filmmakers used minature helicopters for this scene which in some parts you can tell which isn't impressive at all. The part when Ethan is flying by a gluider in the night sky, you can tell it was done by computer generated images! I think the director wanted to give the stunts a more realistic look to them, like what the director managed to succeed in the surprise smash hit Batman Begins. Unfortunately it doesn't work in this film so much. I don't think I would care if I saw those action sequences again or not in Mission Impossible 3.

Since I'm not a big fan of this franchise I would say that others the same as me will probably feel the same way of being disapointed. However those that are fans of this spy actioner will find this to be better than the rating I have given it. Granted that it is much better than the other two films in this franchise but it still could of been improved alot more. It just goes on for too long whilst the action scenes are just too short with huge gaps in between each one. It gives us more focus on the storyline but even that could have been more straight to the point rather than trying to make it awkward to understand. I think that this is worth seeing, but isn't something you could watch over and over again without skipping through certain scenes. A rental will be perfect, but then it just depends what type of company you're with. If it is someone that is most likely to talk if he/she is bored watching the film then you might want to watch it with someone that is reliable not to since some parts to this film you will really need to concentrate whilst watching to understand what is going on. So make sure you're in a good state of mind to watch this, but fear not as you will understand everything that is going on even if you haven't watched the other two films in this franchise. A few good scenes in this doesn't make up for a great experience.

SUPERMAN RETURNS ***** (BRILLIANT)

The latest comic-book adaptation to take the genre up, up and away to dazzling heights, Superman Returns flies into cinemas everywhere with anticipation levels sky high. Every person I have talked to that have seen the film have said it is really good and is one of the best blockbuster movies out now. I heard in one review that it focuses more on the relationship between Clark and Lois, which it does have it's moments but I would say Spiderman and even Daredevil focuses more on the love root. Also as well, this film carries on where Superman 2 left off, forgetting about the other two in the franchise. But apparantly the first two Superman films are much better anyway. I wouldn't know, I remember seeing snibbets of some of the Superman movies but whether I have watched all of them or even one I just don't know. If I did it was a while ago for me to remember. But you don't have to watch the rest of them to understand what is going on in here. It opens up with narration explaining what is going on anyway. Some people I have talked to have said that they really enjoyed Returns but hated the other Superman films, so I guess even if you're not a fan of the comics or the original it doesn't mean that you're not going to enjoy this. So, did I enjoy this? Yes, I certainly did. In fact I would join the rest of the clan by saying this is the best summers blockbuster I have seen so far and definitely beats quite alot of other superhero films I have seen in the cinema these days.

After undergoing a hiatus in space after his home planet Krypton has been destroyed, Superman/Clark Kent (played by newcomer Brandon Routh) makes a heroic return to Metropolis which we can see him reuniting with his mother, which we only get to see a few minutes anyway. Clark goes back to the newspaper agency and receives some heartbreaking news from Lois (Kate Bosworth), the woman he had a chemistry with in the original films, that the hardass reporter has now settled down with a man and has got a son! The man of steal (Superman) puts his blue and red iconic suit back on and shows the people he is back in business by saving coincidently Lois on a plane as it is falling from the sky by a power cut. That is when she first meets him, and it's then we start seeing some more love scenes throughout the film. Superman's arch nemisis lex Luthor (played brilliantly by Kevin Spacey) is plotting our hero's downfall with an outrageous plan to kill "billions!" He has made sure he has plenty of Kryptonite on hand to wipe out the United States and turn it into a land that was alot like Superman's planet for his own taking. His plan is that the rest of the world would want a piece of his estate which he can make a huge profit out of it. Also Lex will use it to defuse the Man of Steel's powers. Can Superman still save the day? Here comes a spoiler so if you don't want to read it then start reading the next paragraph NOW. The boy that Lois has turns out to have superhuman strength, which obviously we are told that he is Superman's child. There is only one part that we see the boy using his power to throw a piano at a villain attacking Lois, so thank god they didn't go over the top with him.

Bryan Singer's sits in the director's chair and shares with us an exhillirating experience. He did X-Men and X-Men 2, two great Marvel comic book adaptions but decided to take a break from doing X-Men 3: The Last Stand (a good choice since not many people enjoyed it as much) and went ahead on this project instead. I really want Bryan to direct more comic book adaptions in the future since I think he has a gift for turning them into movies. It just shows he was a huge fan of the comics and it is shown in his creations. He doesn't risk much in Superman Returns, and keeps it true to the original films and the comic book which is what I respect so much. He does tamper with some wires but he always manages to successfully shine through. Brandon Routh and Kate Bosworth both do a great performance. But if there is anyone that steals the show has to be Kevin Spacey. I don't think anyone else could of played the part of Lex Luthor, and he does it with so much confidence. The best thing is that he doesn't go over the top like some villains do like the Green Goblin in Spiderman. He also looks the part as well!

The special visual effects are amazing! I didn't like the look of the trailers because to me they didn't show that much action, but believe me when I say that there is. I wouldn't say that there is much fighting going on, simply because Superman is invincible which kinda limits suspension to know if he is going to die or not. But there is a hell lot of disaster scenes of people in a life threatening accident, and all of that is used heavily with special effects that keeps getting a more usage for it. There are plenty of scenes that will amaze you, like the part I mentioned earlier when Lois is ona plane with other news reporters as their plunging to their doom as Superman gets to the scene. There is another amazing part when Lois is trapped with her son on a yaught as it is sinking to the depths (Lois seems to never get a break) and then we have Superman on the scene and so forth. So there are alot of things happening but it is only within disaster areas. Except for the battle between Superman and Lex which isn't all that great as the other action scenes. Oh, and also there is one crime spree in which Superman is there to foil which has some great Matrix-style action that the creators of Matrix will be ashamed to not thinking of having that in their films.

This is a film for the whole family. I know you might think that it is going to be another typical superhero movie. My friend Cai thinks that as he said the plot is always a bad guy getting hold of some Kryptonite and using that against Superman, and that he is too invincible for his own good. That might be, but what I didn't agree with him is that Superman Returns is much darker than the other films in the franchise, there isn't much death involved but it certainly is suspensefull if you can put aside knowing that Superman will come to save the day. This is definitely the sort of film you need to watch in the cinema. So if you haven't seen it yet then get down there and watch it soon because I guarantee you that you will not be disapointed. The jokes are pretty good in this as well, so it is funny, suspenseful, and emotional. A great popcorn film that I will most definitely be buying on DVD when it comes out since its the sort of film you can watch over and over again. The young ones might not find it as good as the more older ones and could be a film you could watch with your girlfriend as well. Just be sure that you're wide awake and in the mood to watching it as it does go on for hell of a long time. But you won't feel as if you have been in there for that long when the action kicks in.

I haven't finished Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest review just yet but it should be up tomorrow.

Anyway, the next films I will be reviewing before they come out on rent in the UK are, unfortunately for some, mostly horrors!

Sliver, Hostel, Silent Hill and the thriller Hard Candy.

I will also be reviewing two childrens slapstick movies The Pink Panther and The Shaggy Dog.

Keep a look out for them. Be warned, Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest is gonna be a loooong review!

Good Reviews X)

Well I Generally Agree With Your Reviews, Although I Haven't Seen Alot Of The Films You've Reviewed, I've Been Watching All The Older Movies I Missed When The First Came Out, I'll Have To Catch Omen And Superman, You Must Catch Ghost World Though Its... Well You Read The Review X) As For The Sleepy Hollow Reveiw I Dont KInow I Wrote Those Two And I'm All Reviewed Out, I Hope Someone Else Does It, It Merrits Attention

The Descent ****1/2 (Out of 5)

Over the last few years people seem to have forgotten what the point of a horror movie really is. They seem to think that it's to merely "gross out" simply by showing violence (Saw) or get startled by something moving quickly on screen and making a loud noise. Even recent horror films that I've greatly enjoyed mostly used either one of these tactics. With The Descent, Niel Marshal reminds us all the point of horror films, and does it beautifully.

Starting slowly and using the pacing of a suspense film at first, we are shown the characters. They decide to go cave diving after one of them suffers a terrible tragedy, in hopes that the adventure will give her some fun and excitement. Things begin to go wrong almost instantly for them once they enter the cave. A few jump scares here and there, most of which can be seen a mile away even by a casual viewer, we're lured into a false sense of quiet suspense as the claustrophobic atmosphere is created for us to slowly take in, and their obstacles slowly get more and more dangerous. The "descent" into true visceral horror happens gradually, the arrival - suddenly. Once the horror starts, it doesn't let up. This is a film of such tension, such palpable, real fear, that it is almost overwhelming.

Few films actually scare me, few disturb me, this movie did both. From it's terrifying premise of one of the most horrible situations imaginable somehow becoming MORE terrible, to it's immensely skillful execution, to the monsters, which I think are some of the best movie monsters I've ever seen, this film could not have been better. The film moves from simple jump scares to deeply disturbing and morbid terror, mostly created by both the disgusting creatures that pursue our hero's and the cave itself, so seamlessly that you won't even see it coming. However, something that is also very unsettling is witnessing some of the character's slow "descent" into madness.

The blood and gore is great in this movie. It's used, not to create the terror, but to enhance it. And it's never done to entice and excite, the violence is so damn excruciating, it's what gore should be used for.

With 'The Descent" Neil Marshall cements what I (and probably many) had thought and hoped after viewing Dog Soldiers - his other masterpiece - That he is one of the greatest horror filmmakers in the world, one that I think has a long long career ahead of him.

In short, see this damn movie, right now.

Good review. I'd give it 4* out of 5.

What did you think about the ending?

Spoiler:
Did she escape from the monsters, or her (mad) self? Basically, do you think the monsters were real, or a projection of her imagination as she killed everyone?

I liked the ending quite a bit. But I don't know if you saw the same one I saw. The American ending is supposed to be very different from the original ending that was shown in other countries.

The American ending shows

Spoiler:
Sarah escape to the surface, run to her car and drive away. She then pulls over and begins crying. A large cargo truck drives by and honks at her because she's still blocking a large chunk of the street. Then she puts her head out the window and vomits. When she brings her head back into the car, Juno's "spirit" is sitting next to her staring at her. Sarah screams and it cuts to the credits. I think that the creatures were real, she escaped them, but her guilt of both terrible tragedies will haunt her, rather than the guilt of just one

PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN: DEAD MAN'S CHEST **** (RECOMENDED) <<PART 1>>

Contunuing where Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Pearl let off, this eagerly awaited sequel finds Johnny Depp's scene stealing Captain Jack Sparrow again thrown into the world of the supernatural alongside Orlando Bloom and Keira Knightley for more swash buttling action. I was a big fan of the Pirates of the Caribbean ride that it's based from in the Magic Kingdom's theme park. I went on the one in Orlando and the other in Paris but was shocked when I heard they were making a movie of it. I didn't even realize the ride had a storyline behind it! It all seemed a bit random to me. But what fun it was, and so was the movie when I watched it in the theatres by myself. I will admit not likeing if firstly, but after my mother bought it for me on DVD when it came out for christmas I then started appreciating it much more and now I will recomend it to everyone. It's the film that you have to see. So obviously when the sequel hit the theatres that there was no surprise that it beat the box office records instantly. When I watched it with my girlfriend the theatre was packed! However, it wasn't as good as what I was expecting. I thought first of all it was me going through one of my phraises until I buy the film when it comes out in the stores, but other people have been telling me the same opinion and have actually said a few pointers of why they didn't like it as much as what I have made. If you are a big fan of the original then you will be deeply disapointed with this, and if you haven't watched the original then you will have no idea of what is going on in this. There is still a lot of fun behind Dead Man's Chest but it is just too cheesy for my liking.

There is loads of spoilers in this synopse, so if you don't want a full account of what happens in the film then start reading the next paragraph NOW. Will (Orlando Bloom) and Elizabeth's (Keira Knightley) wedding plans are scuppered by the arrival of the East India Company that attempts to banish all known pirates over the world and have orders to jail and execution the to be married couple for helping Captain Jack Sparrow escape. However, Will makes a deal with them to release him and retrieve the "broken" compass that Jack posesses as it is a map to a burried treasure. Don't worry, though, Elizabeth escapes and travels to look for Will half way through it to be just in time for the action near to the end, unfortunately. Captain Jack Sparrow is back with his crew sailing the ocean on the Black Pearl. Jack discovers from Bootstrap Bill (Stellan Skarsgard), a ghost, that Jack owes a debt to Davy Jones (Bill Nighly) and is left with the black spot scarred into his hand. To avoid his debt Jack orders the crew to flee to the nearest island. Just his luck that the island is inhabbited by hungry cannibals that intent on cooking Sparrow and is crew. When Will Turner finally finds them he to is captured. That is until they all manage to escape back to the Black Pearl and on their way back to the ocean. But this time not only do the crew have Will on board but also two villains from the original that were cursed and chased Will and Jack for a medallion and the blood of Will. These two villains will be joining the rest of the actors and actress' screen time for the rest of the film. Jack tricks Will in going on Davy Jones ship and makes a deal with Captain Jones to spare his life for Wills. It's only time that Will escapes not before meeting his father, who is now a ghost and is working for Davy Jones (but has still got a good spirit), that helps Will. Now, Davy Jones has released a giant squid after the Black Pearl and kill everyone that is on it and send the Black Pearl to its watery grave. So, the final curtain we get to witness the Black Pearl becoming fire wood, what is possibly the death of Jack Sparrow by the giant squid for getting left chained on the ship by Keira Knightley's character (who also kisses him to lure into her trap), and final twist - The resurrection of the villainous Captain of original movies Black Pearl!

Johnny Depp was my favourite actor from the original and I was really looking forward to see him play the camp/drunk pirate that he was clearly born to play. The studio, that you would be surprised to know is Walt Disney, let Johnny Depp do his routine all over again but this time just wasn't as impressive. He does an outstanding job but the writer just gives him too many one liners making him out more of a joke in this. Also they make him out to be more selfish and spiteful which just isn't what we're used to seeing from our Jack. He sends Will Turner to an eternity of slavory on board the Davy Jones ship and flees the Black Pearl when the squid attacks with the only boat that was on it leaving his crew behind. Also he has sword fights with Will trying to get the treasure for himself. I don't recall him being like that in the original which is hard now to like him and feel sorry for him near to the end. Maybe it would help that all his one liners are funny, but some of them can be cheesy as hell, and that goes the same for the other jokes that they have the other actors and actress' say. Bill Nighly does a decent job of playing the villain this time round as Davy Jones. Depended heavily on makeup making him look like a mutated squid with cgi tentacles. They really done a amazing job on him, and his acting is as ever impressive that the film would have sunk if he didn't do a good job. Orlando Bloom is alright, pretty much the same as in the original, nothing really to admire. Keira Knightley hasn't got much screen time as she did before and is pointless to even be in it. I didn't mind her character so much in the original but the stuff they have her to do and say just makes me go off her. The trouble with this is that they bring back alot of people that was in the original when they don't really need to. Another person that joins the Black Pearl that I didn't mention in the premise is the character that wanted to marry Elizabeth in the original! He has now turned to piracy since he has been fired from his job and is now living the life of a tramp that he curses Jack Sparrow for. It's just... Why bring him back in this!? Is there any need for him to? Also the same goes for those two villains that escape from prison, the big one and the skinny one, they do a funny duo in this but it's just not essential to the storyline. I suppose the cgi creatures that works for Davy Jones are more entertaining than most of the others that are real. Stellan Skarsgard plays Will's father Bootstrap Bill that also works for Davy Jones now he has given his soul over to him. Bootstrap Bill is already dead but not as rotted away as the cgi villains. He is a horrible actor and there just isn't any chemistry between him and Will, doesn't even help him out that much and has not much screen time at all. I will say that the squid is amazing, it's just a shame that all these great characters have to be the cgi ones!

PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN: DEAD MAN'S CHEST **** (RECOMENDED) <<PART 2>>

The special visual effects are amazing! Theres plenty of it in here than what it was in the original. In fact, there's a little too much and alot of unnesessory sword fighting scenes. Some can be boring whilst others are experimented with special visual effects making the action very cheesy. I mean, there is a part in which Orlando, Johnny Depp and the actor that played the commodore in the original are fighting on a huge wooden wheel that rolls them down a hill and back to the Black Pearl whilst their fighting on it! Don't even get me started with what happens on the island that is over run by cannibals. Some of the incidents are quite funny but can also be eye rolling. I think the only part that made everyone laugh as loud as they did was when Johnny shot a crow that was pecking away on his cofin near the beginning when we're first introduced to Captain Jack Sparrow. Don't get me wrong, there are loads of funny parts but in order to understand them you must have watched the original already otherwise you will hear some people laughing while you haven't got a clue why their laughing for. I will say that the best action scene has to be with the squid that is trying to bring down the Black Pearl. It was just so spectacular watching the tentacles wrapping around the ship and then breaking through its sails and then swipping through the crew! It reminded me of the New Zealand company who did the special effects for Lord of the Rings Trilogy and the remake of King Kong. It was just amazing visual trickery that will do wonder for the eyes, I would say the squid was my favourite character alongside Johnny Depp and Bill Nighly! The squid isn't even supposed to be a character in it! I think it was that idea of bringing the squid into it that saved the film. Even Johnny Depp wouldn't have been able to do this alone, not this time.

If you're a huge fan of the original then you will be very disapointed with this one. If you haven't watched the original then you will have no clue what the hell is going on in Dead Man's Chest! The special visual effects are absolutely marvelous to look at, but yet some fighting scenes may be dull and very corny. Also, the dialogue and incidents that happen in this will be corny with too many performers from the original making an appearance in this. Also the ending gives us more questions than answers about the plot and made me leave the cinema with an unsatisfyed expression on my face. It's not just me you will find have been saying this, yes, the critics are finally dead on the money this time. I will definitely be buying this on DVD but only because I have already got the original and for the squid sequences again with the odd scene that I cared for. It is funny, and will make you laugh but again that only applies if you have watched the original. But then to understand some of the story and characters you must watch the original first! I think the younger generation will love this more than the adults as it has alot more fantasy and surreal moments. However, the older ones will find that this containts alot more slapstick than what it should of, at least the original knew its limits! Watch this in the cinema by all means, as if you want something visual to stare at then this will be perfect for the big screen. Just don't expect to like it as much as the original.