When Chuck Norris's wife burned the turkey one Thanksgiving, Chuck said, "Don't worry about it honey," and went into his backyard. He came back five minutes later with a live turkey, ate it whole, and when he threw it up a few seconds later it was fully cooked and came with cranberry sauce. When his wife asked him how he had done it, he gave her a roundhouse kick to the face and said, "Never question Chuck Norris."
Chuck Norris. (n.) Vaguely Village People-ish Cowboy, prominently known for roundhouse kicks, headlocks using his thighs, and his masterful technique in defeating Keanu Reeves. syn. orange, chest hair, martial arts. ant. barber, shaving cream, pacifism.
Used in a sentence: Chuck Norris cracks skulls with his raging fists.
(v.) to pummel someone into a bloody pulp with roundhouse kicks. syn. battery. ant. surrender. Used in a sentence. I totally Chuck Norris'd that guy.
When Chuck Norris goes to his bathroom to urinate, the bacteria in the toilet can actually be heard to yowl audibly in pain. However, no one has confirmed that it is the toilet bacteria, since whoever intrudes upon Chuck Norris when he's doing his thing is met with a enchantingly nasty fatal roundhouse kick.