glad you liked it piratediva!!!! love your comments, they're always so positive!!!😄
and sailor, how could i leave you?! 😄 you havent even had your wedding yet hehehehe!!! 😄 😄
hey i have a query...
when your watching a vid on youtube.com but everytime you load a vid only a little or half the vid loads up...what do you do??
does anyone have this problem???
or is there something terminally wrong with my computer?? lol
Johnny
Day - cant really say...
dear ichy
ok so it was a low-blow and im really digging into the depths of deprivity just by THINKING up all of my evil-yet-not-because-its-keira-so-it-doesnt-really-matter plots to get keira back....
But in my defence it is MY matress!!!!
She stompted so loudly around the yacht this morning that i honestly thought there were a heard of elephants in there with me instead of keira!!!
Things only got worse when i called her up on it....
Word to the wise lads;
NEVER call a woman an elephant as she is likely to think you are calling her fat...
and to add to those words of wisdom;
Dont then EVER ask a woman if her ever-increasing moodswings are because its 'that time of the month'...
You will surely live to regret it!
She started banging cupboard doors and 'accidentally' throwing things in my general direction -
[including my Iggy Pop cd collection...the girl wouldnt know memorabelia if it stopped on the side of a road and asked her directions!!!]
- which only infuriated me so much that i got up from my matress, walked over to her, grabbed hold of her and threw her over my shoulder!!!
I tried to walk as far as i could with her there -
[All the while she was biting and scratching and saying how much she was going to kill me]
- when i found sad-sack and jack rehearsing their lines....
They found it quite confusing until i stated;
"Penny-a-smack, lads!!!" and pointed to her backside.
"YOU DARE!" she screamed...it was hilarious!
Needless to say, that went on for hours....and i made the equivilant of $10 in caribbean money....
Oh the delights of being an evil B@$t@rd!!!!
Jackie-poo!!
Day - i know no time or date...i only know the love of a woman that seems to love my money more than she loves me!
Dear Norrie
Stange, strange things are happening to everyone lately...
*kev keeps turning up on set drunk - though to his gratitude all of the crew said he acted better like that...
*Sad-sa...er, Orlando keeps carrying a mirror around with him...mumbling something about; "You can do it...believe in yourself...your a beautiful man...." ...off putting really when your trying to do some 'straight' acting and hes there chanting to himself....
W@nker!
*Johnny keeps trying to pawn keira off on me and orlando -
[He even said he would trade MY fiancee for her....why he would want to put that burden on himself, i dont know....]
*And keira apparently likes to get her ass spanked....
Ill tell you, you never really know someone until you've slapped their behind a few times....
Life couldn't be dandier for me though....
My beloved has set the date for our wedding...but shes put a nookie ban on me until the day!!!!!
so i have to wait till feb 14th (yup, valentines day!) to get the slightest bit of action..............
*cries*
We're going to windsor castle in England -
[Apparently sailor made a few phonecalls and threatened the queen until she let her have the wedding there...not unlike her, i must say]
-and its going to be romantic....
romantically EXPENSIVE!!!!
I've seen 'THE' list!!!!
She has half of america coming with her on the plane!!! and half of america are her BRIDESMAIDS!!!!!!!!
On the brightside, i asked Bill nighy to be my best man....but after he declined -
[Because apparently my little lilipution scares him within an inch of his life![]
- I had no other option than to ask Sad-sack....
Who cried....
again....
I swear he's on aestrogen tablets.....
Keira
Day - Ive lost the will to live...again...
dear snuggles
My ass hurts - from being man-handled
My Head hurts - from the stress of Johnny
My Back hurts - from the mattress-less bed im lying on BECAUSE of Johnny...
I swear, i think im beginning to get a Johnny-phobia!
I came back yesterday to find the man building ANOTHER bonfire by his yacht!!!
I asked him if he was planning to throw himself on it -
[To which i was bitterly disappointed to hear that he wasn't]
- when he turned around with THAT smirk on his face.
After a while of standing there and glaring back at him...i noticed a rather familiar smell coming from the bonfire....
HE WAS BURNING MY CUDDLY TOYS!!!!!
Well that was it, i saw red!!!
When i slammed through the yacht and made loads of noise, i could hear him laughing at me outside...
but little did he know that i had a trick up my sleeve!
...he was laughing out of the other side of his face when he saw his 'Rolling Stones' LP's flying out of the open windows like frisbees!!!
He couldn't say anything for a while...he just stood there...
until i stood in the window with a pair of scissors and his favourite guitar....
Thats when he made a run for the door of the yacht -
[Which i had already locked...and it would be locked for a LOOOONG time after what i planned on doing!!!]
- and started begging me to put his prescious rosie down!!!
"You save one of my toys, and i won't snip one of your strings" I told him gleefully.
"Fine, whatever you want!!" he yelled, running back over to the fire.
I got my Medium-sized green haired troll back, and my pink 'little pony' ....
Sadly, Johnny lost both his 'G' string and his 'A-minor' ....
He's still out there now...putting his poor Rosie 'to rest' ....
I almost feel sorry for him....
Almost!