Jack Bauer runs the Die Hard Gauntlet

So thats all you have?
If so:

The McWinnage is now beyond doubt.

I had hoped that since you were McButthurt enough to break rules in bringing in a TV character to a MVF debate that a worthy opposition would be offered in Bauer. But alas no.

As far as civilisation being affected goes..how do you know out of the thousands and thousands of lives that McClane saved in Die Hard 4.0 alone what the ripples were. McClane's opponents cannot be downplayed.

It works as stated. McClane pwns Bauer (who faced generic TV villianry all the way and got tortured to death by a weapon that old ladies in the DH world carry...) no way can Bauer therefore win this gauntlet..
🙂

Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
So thats all you have?
If so:

Bauer receiving a pleausrable McBlowjob is now beyond doubt.

Indeed.

And by "All I have" I assume you mean the mountains of evidence I posted which prove that Bauer destroys McClane, compared to your dodging (such as this) and posting of hyperbole ("MCCLANE SHOVED DA KAR UP HER RECTUM!!!!!! LOLZ!!)

Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
As far as civilisation being affected goes..how do you know out of the thousands and thousands of lives that McClane saved in Die Hard 4.0 alone what the ripples were. McClane's opponents cannot be downplayed.

Congratulations. 5 more nuclear meltdowns to go, and 5 other apocalypses, and then McClane might be on Bauer's level

Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
Bauer got tortured to death by a weapon

Clearly him in his junior days, considering he's withstood that exact same form of torture for 20 months later in life.

Just as you would say McClane sitting to cry about the glass in his foot was only him in his early showings

Wouldn't want any biased hypocrisy, would we? 😉

Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
no way can Bauer therefore win this gauntlet..
🙂

I don't understand. The people who have actually managed to subdue Bauer (he's killed all of them except one, who he let get arrested) are far more competent than the chump wannabe terrorists McClane needs a good night's rest before he can go up against.

Gabriel was an actual terrorist, but Bauer's taken on cyber-terrorists threatening the US infrastructure and terrorists threatening to meltdown every nuclear reactor in the US, and facephucked their plans in 10 and 6 hours after discovering them, respectively, so Gabriel is most definitely not anywhere near "Bauer Villain" level

So if McClane's merc villains are chumps Bauer would manhandle, and his actual terrorist villains are chumps Bauer would manhandle, it's quite clear that this:

Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
no way can Bauer therefore win this gauntlet..

is in fact a load of unmitigated, biased, hypocritical, ignorant (as you haven't seen/ are actively ignoring the feats), and of course, undisputedly false bullshit 🙂

Bauer easily wins the Gauntlet and the fight with McClane. McClane's probably not gonna make it past the plane crash in Day 2, even though he doesn't strike me as the kind of guy who would even be able to perform the operations to get to that point, so I'm granting him a lot of leeway there 😂. Like I said, if there is a "Who can whine and bytch the most about their circumstances" match, then McClane will easily beat Bauer

The 'mountains' of inadmissable evidence might as well be a couple of grains of sand here, where movie screen feats count.
So your answer seems to be 'yes' in answer to my rhetorical question.
Hyberbole like "tortured for monthz with the electric" you mean?
Come on now.

If ever Bauer becomes legible, appearing in a box office released movie for instance with all these feats intact, then Bauer can go up to McClane level, once feats are stripped down to what happened on screen rather than the falsely blown up/embellished ones you mention in this thread.
Old lady FTW.

McClane actually never cried once about any glass in his foot.

"Withstood it the next time it happened in his next life after he was killed to death the 1st time", you mean. Again: Hes not getting past Tazer lady.

No BS here. (From the McClane side, anyhow)... All McFeats are valid, noted and checkable on screen.
Bauer wouldnt have been able to take the unique avenues that McClane does, have the same attributes and qualities that allow him to get through most of these movies. So wannabe autowin claims of "Bauer performance=McClane performance" thinking won't wash here, no matter how badly Bauer wants to be McClane.

Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
no matter how badly Bauer wants to be McClane.

Bauer does own a pair of John McClane pajamas.

Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
The 'mountains' of inadmissable evidence might as well be a couple of grains of sand here

You so are ignoring feats. Indeed.

Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
Hyberbole like "tortured for monthz with the electric" you mean?

That's not hyperbole 😐 . Clearly displayed in the video posted above. Then again, you are ignoring feats, so......

Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
Old lady FTW.

He have feats that directly counter his Day 2 torture and show that he was in his junior years when that happened. Then again, you are ignoring feats, so....

Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
No BS here. (From the McClane side, anyhow)... All McFeats are valid, noted and checkable on screen.

McClane actually never cried once about any glass in his foot.

😆 Your biased lies are hilarious! And thing is, you're the McClane expert 😂

Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
"Withstood it the next time it happened in his next life after he was killed to death the 1st time", you mean. Again: Hes not getting past Tazer lady.

So what? Jason Voorhees was killed, and then ressurected via electrocution, and came back an immortal zombie. Bauer went through the exact same process and gained the same powers of superhuman strength, durability, and offscreen teleportation, given what he is able to withstand and do. So Bauer=Zombie Jason>>>>>>>>>>>>>>McClane

And once again, you have failed to explain how this old lady will be keeping a tazer on Young Bauer's heart without him immediately snapping her neck, which he's done many times before. I have video feats of this directly in my sig. Then again, you are ignoring feats, so.....

Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
Bauer wouldnt have to take the unique avenues that McClane does, have the same attributes and qualities that allow him to get through most of these movies.

....Because it would be farrrrr easier for Bauer, without having to resort to such desperate tactics...

Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
So wannabe autowin claims of "Bauer performance=McClane performance" thinking won't wash here.

Eww. Why would I say that?
Clearly, it's:
Bauer performance>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>McClane performance

Ignoring feats like the one that shows that Old Lady With Tazer kills Bauer...? The ones that show that Bauer has no hope at all against an Octogenearean with an battery operated toy.
No Im not.

Your constant downplay, gimping, denial of happenings and general McButthurt says all.

Oh so how is that biased lie? Sounds like you need to rewatch the movie, so that you can see what happened in it.
Sounds like you're the one in the land of ignorance.

Vorhees had actual movie feats.
Very different character and attributes. So no, that doesnt hold up logically in any way whatsoever.

Probably not.

And nah. Bauer has no movie performances.

"Zzzzzzzaapppp!!!
Zzzzzzappp!!!
Zappity Zappity Zap-Zap!!!!!!!"/End

Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
Ignoring feats like the one that shows that Old Lady With Tazer kills Bauer...?

😆 When did this happen?

Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
My constant downplay, gimping, denial of happenings and general McButthurt says all.

Indeed.

Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
Very different character and attributes.

Different character yes. Attributes.......

Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
Probably not.

How so? We've already established it will be easy for him. Only place he can go is into the "effortless" range

Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
"Zzzzzzzaapppp!!!
Zzzzzzappp!!!
Zappity Zappity Zap-Zap!!!!!!!"

I've already established how he was in his junior, inexperienced years when he did that, just like McClane was in his inexperienced years when he had to take a time out to tend to his foot.

Originally posted by Lestov16
😆 When did this happen?

Indeed. You're right about me and my McVendetta.

Different character yes. Attributes too.......

We've already established it will be nigh on impossible for Bauer. Only place this debate can go is into the "effortless" range.

I've already established how he was in his junior, inexperienced years when he did that, just like McClane was in his inexperienced years when he had to take a time out to tend to his foot for only a couple of minutes before going on to save the day and kill all the bad guys.

Glad you agree.

5 mins or less out. Not 20 months lol

Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
5 mins or less out. Not 20 months lol

That is a perfect calculation for how long McClane would last in Jack's shoes before he breaks down like a punk-ass biznitch and starts crying about how he wants to go home and see his wife

Originally posted by Lestov16
That is a perfect calculation for how long Jack would last in Mac's shoes before he breaks down like a punk-ass biznitch and starts crying about how he wants to go home and see his wife

I agree.

It appears you've miscalculated. You have to remember that in regards to McClane, you have to move the decimal point to the left quite a few times to gage his skill level....

S04E02, Bauer got his ass handed to him by a guy named Ronnie. Come on, man.

Not Season 6, man. Seriously. Watch this:
YouTube video

and then watch him in season 6. He is clearly operating on a superhuman level of durability at that point that far exceeds anything McClane has taken. Added onto the other injuries he's received in his lifetime before and after that, (and given that you are about to delve into the first "action-oriented" season, you're about to see him get (and definitely give) a lot of them), he clearly outclasses McClane in the durability dept. and would undisputedly clear this gauntlet of chumps with ease.

How far do you think McClane would get in the Bauer Gauntlet (which in this case is Day 1-3)?

OT what were your thoughts of S3?

Nah he'd still get whupped.
McClane is still better.
And thats is a TV show.

Well whilst we are at it, G1 Megatron would kill Bauer too.
So would Rumble.
Bauer probably could kill the "Little house on the Prarie" cast, ill give you that..(As long as even the weakest among them didn't have a taser, that is..)
But Megatron (or even Rumble) could kill him like McClane would.

But Bauer operates in the same arenas/broadcast format as Oprah.

Oprah.

Originally posted by Robtard
S04E02, Bauer got his ass handed to him by a guy named Ronnie. Come on, man.

"Rectumnomics"

Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
Nah he'd still get whupped.

Not by McClane or any of his adversaries.

Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
McClane is still better.

At what? H2H? No. Gunfight? No. Gauntlet? No. Counterterrorism? No. Heroism? no. Overall Badassery? No. Whining and complaining about circumstances. Yes

Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
Well whilst we are at it, G1 Megatron would kill Bauer too.
So would Rumble.

But Megatron (or even Rumble) could kill him like McClane would.

Could you post some of their feats so I can see absurdly obvious your claim is and also how McClane would fare against him. Not a Transformers fan. Bad press around the Bay films didn't help. Once you do, I'll let you in on something equivalent in obviousness

Listen closely....

Water....is......

Spoiler:
wet

Stop strawmanning. Are you saying McClane is now equivalent to a giant extraterretrial mech 😆?

Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
Bauer probably could kill the "Little house on the Prarie" cast, ill give you that.....

I'll let you in on something equivalent in obviousness

Listen closely....

Water....is......

Spoiler:
wet

😱 [/B]

Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
But Bauer operates in the same arenas as Oprah.

If they operated in the same arena, Jack would snap her neck like a twig like he did the last guy he was in an arena with 😉

Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
/broadcast format

The relevance here is at the utmost levels of "ir"

Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
"Rectumnomics"

Jack would probably know all about that. Was probably digging through and examining Pavel's rectum after he disemebowled him like a pig after torturing him horribly, just like he is going to do to McClane ✅

Originally posted by Lestov16
Not by McClane or any of his adversaries.

Says you with no actual evidence, cited evidence that doesnt really show anything that McClane couldn't pull off.

At what? H2H? Yes. Gunfight? Yes, due to McUnkillablity. Gauntlet? Yes., as McClane has already done it with flying colours. Bauer comes up lacking though. Counterterrorism? Most probably. Heroism? Absolutely. Overall Badassery? Of course. Whining and complaining about circumstances. Nah. And not really surprising since the comparatively wussy Bauer has that much more to moan about.

Fixed.

Could you post some of their feats so I can see absurdly obvious your claim is and also how McClane would fare against him. Not a Transformers fan. Bad press around the Bay films didn't help. Once you do, I'll let you in on something equivalent in obviousness

Listen closely....

Water....is......

Spoiler:
wet

😱

Stop strawmanning. Are you saying McClane is now equivalent to a giant extraterretrial mech 😆?

As far as Bauer is concerned, yes.
So as you can now see: Not a slight bit of strawmannery from me.

If they operated in the same arena, Jack would snap her neck like a twig like he did the last guy he was in an arena with 😉

Not if they have a Taser.
As for arena: The arena of TV. The one with lots of girly chat shows and animated cartoons, x-factor and various tv movies that were never released at the cinema, presumably cause no one in their right mind would invest in for distribution of any kind.. (And in Bauer's case: Because he is a wannabe McClone, and we were done with the hordes of immitator movies that exploded onto screens in the nineties.)Quality TV shows like Firefly occasionally made the grade though.

Basically the Care Bears could have done Bauer.

The relevance here is at the utmost levels of "ir"

I've shown you the relevance. Ignore it or not.

Jack would probably know all about that. Was probably digging through and examining Pavel's rectum after he disemebowled him like a pig after torturing him horribly, just like he is going to do to McClane ✅

Corpses cant disembowel people, you silly. So McClane goes home jubilant and drinking beers and smoking cigarettes and chuckling to himself. Zzzzap!

Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
Says you with no actual evidence,

Really now?

Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
cited evidence that doesnt really show anything that McClane couldn't pull off.

Well yeah. Except for the 20 months of torture. And well.....everything else 🙂

Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
Fixed.

I agree. You did just horribly castrate that list

Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
As far as Bauer is concerned, yes.

No as far as Bauer is concerned McClane is a whiny cop

Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
So as you can now see: Not a slight bit of strawmannery from me.

Besides virtually everything you post, no. No strawmannery

Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
Not if they have a Taser.

Zzzzap!

You're blatantly ignoring his higher showings

Bauer suffered a LOT of zaps when he was tortured by the Chinese. He didn't care then, so he won't care now. Let's compare this to a guy who has to take a time out to cry because he stepped on some glass 😂

Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
As for arena: The arena of TV. The one with lots of girly chat shows and animated cartoons, x-factor and various tv movies that were never released at the cinema, presumably cause no one in their right mind would invest in for distribution of any kind.. (And in Bauer's case: Because he is a wannabe McClone, and we were done with the hordes of immitator movies that exploded onto screens in the nineties.)Quality TV shows like Firefly occasionally made the grade though.

Originally posted by Lestov16
The relevance here is at the utmost levels of "ir"

Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
Corpses cant disembowel people, you silly.

Look, I know Bauer is essentially an undead indestructible Jason-Voorhees-style zombie, but he has screenfeats of disembowel people who phuck with him. Unless you're ignoring those 😂

Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
So McClane goes home to NYC where his wife and daughter are frightened to look at his mutilated body in the morgue

Yes

McWin. Due to qualifying Moviefeats and all-round-betterness, and is aided for all we know by onscreen feats is unkillable.
If its McClane's unkillablity VS Bauers ability to come back to life eventually, then McClane kills Bauer, and before he can reanimate, McClane inserts a grenade into Bauer's botty and pulls the pin, retreating to wisecrack as Bauer's corpse is detonated into tiny little pieces that gracefully float back to earth like a balletic rain of shit: Not only to be sure..but also to set up the amusing wisecrack that follows perfectly.

Bauer is not as impressive. He is easily killed by Tazer. And his McComparative unimpressiveness was estblished in a TV series.

What I found interesting, is that after just 18-months of being out of the field and behind a desk-type job, Bauer lost his mojo, hence the ass-handing-by-a-guy-name-Ronnie scene.

While McClane in Diehard 4.0 had gone 12-years without having to be a super-cop and having been leading the life of a mundane donut-eater; yet fell right back into the role as easy as if he riding a bike for the first time in decade.