Is **** shaming wrong?

Originally posted by samhain
No he isn't. What's the old saying; What you don't know can't hurt you... unless there's a wasp hanging out in one of your slippers.

Sure it can, if the person she cheated with gave her an STD which she then passed to her BF. that would be harm.

Originally posted by Silent Master
Sure it can, if the person she cheated with gave her an STD which she then passed to her BF. that would be harm.

Well this hypothetical person is me and I would use protection, so the point is moot really. And the BF getting an STD would count as him finding out IMO.

Originally posted by samhain
No he isn't. What's the old saying; What you don't know can't hurt you... unless there's a wasp hanging out in one of your slippers.

Pretending that ignorance is a free pass in guilty behaviours is not healthy for the one cheating. Also it kind of denies their partner of the maturity of dealing with a real situation and infantilises them terribly.

I think that hindering personal growth is caring too much about the relationship as an status and too little about your partner. Learning is supposed to be painful as you meet with actual resistance.

Originally posted by samhain
No he isn't. What's the old saying; What you don't know can't hurt you... unless there's a wasp hanging out in one of your slippers.

Dating someone with zero respect for you is never harmless.

Now when it comes to knowingly getting with a woman who has a bf/husband, it's up to the person if they wanna do that. You take on that risk, including the risk of anything that happens to you if the bf/husband finds out what you were up to lol. It doesn't mean anything a potential bf/husband does to you would be justified, but then again if one decides to engage in stupid games they need to accept that stupid prizes might be handed out.

Originally posted by Surtur
Dating someone with zero respect for you is never harmless.

Now when it comes to knowingly getting with a woman who has a bf/husband, it's up to the person if they wanna do that. You take on that risk, including the risk of anything that happens to you if the bf/husband finds out what you were up to lol. It doesn't mean anything a potential bf/husband does to you would be justified, but then again if one decides to engage in stupid games they need to accept that stupid prizes might be handed out.

^Triggered.

Originally posted by Surtur
^Triggered.

Originally posted by Surtur
Dating someone with zero respect for you is never harmless.

Now when it comes to knowingly getting with a woman who has a bf/husband, it's up to the person if they wanna do that. You take on that risk, including the risk of anything that happens to you if the bf/husband finds out what you were up to lol. It doesn't mean anything a potential bf/husband does to you would be justified, but then again if one decides to engage in stupid games they need to accept that stupid prizes might be handed out.

Who said anything about zero respect? Are you imagining that this woman goes back to her BF and mocks and ridicules him or something? Or that this man is so stupid he dates a person who has zero respect for him? Anything this person does to me is justified as well you say? Like literally anything? Sleeping with somebody who is in a relationship is the most heinous thing a person can do and anything goes after that? I disagree, just saying.

Originally posted by samhain
Who said anything about zero respect? Are you imagining that this woman goes back to her BF and mocks and ridicules him or something?

Originally posted by samhain
Who said anything about zero respect? Are you imagining that this woman goes back to her BF and mocks and ridicules him or something? Or that this man is so stupid he dates a person who has zero respect for him? Anything this person does to me is justified as well you say? Like literally anything? Sleeping with somebody who is in a relationship is the most heinous thing a person can do and anything goes after that? I disagree, just saying.

Unless the first thing she does upon seeing the guy is confess there is indeed zero respect lol.

To be fair there wasn't much respect there to begin with if they're cheating, not for themselves or their partner.

Originally posted by Surtur
Unless the first thing she does upon seeing the guy is confess there is indeed zero respect lol.

I'm not sure why it's wrong to expect people not to sleep around, and to expect honesty if they do?

Nor do I see why it's wrong to correctly point out if someone is cheating on you they don't respect you.

I'm not trying to say that it's not disrespectful to cheat on your partner, rather that if said partner is oblivious to it then they themselves don't feel disrespected, so they're not necessarily hurt by a one-night stand.

Originally posted by Bentley
Pretending that ignorance is a free pass in guilty behaviours is not healthy for the one cheating. Also it kind of denies their partner of the maturity of dealing with a real situation and infantilises them terribly.

I think that hindering personal growth is caring too much about the relationship as an status and too little about your partner. Learning is supposed to be painful as you meet with actual resistance.

Agree with this.

Originally posted by samhain
No he isn't. What's the old saying; What you don't know can't hurt you... unless there's a wasp hanging out in one of your slippers.

I bet guys who roofie women say this. 👆

Originally posted by cdtm
I bet guys who roofie women say this. 👆

Maybe. As far as I'm aware though, people who are roofied and assaulted are aware that something occurred after some time (drug wears off or whatever). I'm sure there are exceptions though.

Originally posted by samhain
Maybe. As far as I'm aware though, people who are roofied and assaulted are aware that something occurred after some time (drug wears off or whatever). I'm sure there are exceptions though.

So, for those exceptions; no harm done, right?

Originally posted by Silent Master
So, for those exceptions; no harm done, right?

That was hyperbole for the roofie scenario, I'm not advocating gentle date rape, or date rape of any kind for that matter.

Originally posted by samhain
That was hyperbole for the roofie scenario, I'm not advocating gentle date rape, or date rape of any kind for that matter.

But if the person was unaware anything happened, it's ok. right?

Originally posted by samhain
I'm not trying to say that it's not disrespectful to cheat on your partner, rather that if said partner is oblivious to it then they themselves don't feel disrespected, so they're not necessarily hurt by a one-night stand.