Simpsons quotes thread

Started by Reckoning6 pages

Homer: Barney's film had heart, but Football in the Groin had a football in the groin.

Homer: i dont believe it, ive finally found a job where i wasnt lazy stupid or corrupt. AND IM GOING TO GET KILLED FOR IT!

Homer: "I did it. I changed the world. Now I know exactly how God feels"

Homer: "Don't worry head. The computer will do our thinking for us now."

Mr Burns: ''I don't get it Smithers, why aren't I as popular as all these other millionaires?''

Mr Smithers: ''The people see you as somewhat of an ogre sir...''

Mr Burns: I ought to club them and eat their bones!''

---

Sideshow Bob: ''Who is that?''

*peers across the gorge*

Sideshow Bob: ''Why, it's Bart Simpson!''

*waves and shouts*

Sideshow Bob: ''Helloooo Bart!''

*Bart throws himself into the bushes*

*Bob turns to his brother*

Sideshow Bob: ''He's just a little shy because I've tried to kill him so many times.''

Cecil: ''Ah.''

---

FBI Agent: ''Ok Homer, you will now be called Mr...Thompson of Terror Lake. Lets try that out. Hello Mr Thompson.''

*Homer stares blankly*

FBI Agent: ''Remember now, your name is Mr Thompson.''

Homer: ''Ok.''

FBI Agent: ''Hello Mr Thompson''

*Homer stares blankly*

*4 hours later, the agent has slung his jacket over his chair, lit a cigarette and has grown a five o'clock shadow*

FBI Agent: ''Listen! When I press down on your foot and say hello Mr Thompson, you smile and nod.''

Homer: ''Got ya.''

*Agent stamps on Homer's foot*

FBI Agent: ''HELLO MR THOMPSON!''

*Homer stares blankly, then leans over to the guy sitting next to him*

Homer: (whispers) ''I think he's talking to you.''

*Agent buries his face in his hands*

I could go on all day 😊

Homer - Max Power doesn’t cuddle. You just strap yourself in and feel the G's.

Titania: Ew! You said if I slept with you, I wouldn't have to touch the drunk.
Duffman: Duffman says a lot of things. Oh, yeah!

Originally posted by mouth
i'm a rage a holic.. i just can't life without rage-a-hol!! -homer

🤘 😄

Sailor Guy: Oh my god! How did you miss that! (or something)
Seacaptain: Y'arr... Two glass eyes...

Re: Simpsons quotes thread

Originally posted by DarkAge
Post your favourite Simpsons quotes here. Can someone sticky this? Here are some of mine:

Bart: Now is the winter of our discontent.
.

Ummmmm....that would be a line from Family Guy....thats what Stewie said NOT bart

Homer:Marge...my pockets hurt

Homer (looking on the internet) : "If there's a better use for the internet, I havn't found it.

Milhouse:Remember when santa's little helper ate my goldfish and you kept telling me I never had a goldfish, Then why did I have the bowl Bart, why did I have the bowl?

Homer: ive come to hate my own creation, now i know how god feels

Scully: Homer, we're going to ask you a few simple yes or no questions. Do you understand?
Homer: Yes. (lie dectector blows up)
i'm a rage a holic.. i just can't life without rage-a-hol!!

My favorites!!!!

Ralph: Hahaha...dying tickles!!!

Bart: I'm displaying my rage at the machine!

Homer: *to the tune of the Flinstones theme* From the town of Springfield, he's about to hit a chestnut tree!

Homer: I'm gonna mace you good!!!

Homer: Where's the any key?

😆

Grandpa: My Homer is not a communist. He may be a liar, a pig, an idiot, a communist, but he is not a porn star.

Re: Re: Simpsons quotes thread

Originally posted by Drumdude1167
Ummmmm....that would be a line from Family Guy....thats what Stewie said NOT bart

Homer:Marge...my pockets hurt


In defense, Bart stated this Shakespeare quote from Richard III in the episode where they make Radioactive Man into a movie. Now back to the quotes.

Frink attempts to open the caged bully.
Random Nerd: Frink? Are you crazy? Put down that science pole!

D'oh!

Lionel Hutz: Well, he's kind of had it in for me ever since I accidentally ran over his dog. Actually, replace "accidentally" with "repeatedly," and replace "dog" with "son."

Car Salesman: Those are speedholes, they make the car go faster.
Homer: Oh yeah, speedholes!

Chief Wiggum: Sideshow Bob has no decency. He called me Chief Piggum. (laughs) Oh wait, I get it, he's all right.

Moe: A garage! Hey listen fellas, a garage! Well, ooladida Mr French Man.
Homer: Well what do you call it?
Moe: A carhole!

Homer (commenting on his "Grrl Power" Apron):
Heh Heh. Grill Power.

Homer: How about 'Screw Flanders!'
Lisa: Bon Apetite.
Homer: We make a good team, a groin grabbingly good team.