Remake of the Trilogy {KMC style}

Started by Leggy_n_Merry7 pages

hahahaha guys this is so funny 😆 how can ya think of it all, I wanna join in but I can't think 🙁 sorry to interrupt 😮

Please post things like these in Tig. Unless you're posting something part of the remake.

Frodo: *looking at Sam* What?

sam: well, yo ucalled bill a dragon...

frodo: bill?

sam: ...bo bilbo, its a nickname, if you follow me

frodo: *runs to get bilbo* hopefully sam...the dragon will eat you, your big enough to fill it up till breakfast next tuesday!

sam: why thank you mr frodo!

frodo: its not a comp....never mind

*dragon flies over and explodes*

hobbits: yey!!!

Bilbo: did sombody say speech!

hobbits: NOOOO

bilbo: well, one day...back in my youth.....*twenty three minutes later* and that is how i single handedly killed smaug, and defeated the orcs and wolves, anyway....im talking connfusing saying things like i know less than half of you half as well as i should like and like less then half of you half as well as you deserve

hobbits: O_o O_o o_O o_O *._.* (<<koala bear)

bilbo: im going now bye *poof*

hobbits: *dont laugh*

frodo: wha'??

*bag end door opens*

gandalf: i suppose you think your terribly sexy

bilbo: what?

gandalf: i mean clever, sorry dont know WHERE my mind was

bilbo: sexy, gandalf.....is that lipstick!

lobellia: bye babes

bilbo: OMG!!

gandalf: what, i get lonely! anwhoo you owe me your ring

bilbo: YOU SLEPT WITH MY COUSINS WIFE

gandalf: i think you have dwelled on the subject long enough

bilbo: what buissness of yours is it what i think of my own cousin

gandalf: BILBO BAGGINS!!!! DO NOT THINK OF SUCH THINGS< ITS NOT NORMAL *shrinks* its illegal

bilbo: oooh gandalf *hugs gandy* whats that

gandalf: damn....staff....

Bilbo: I'm gonna hi-tail it outta here now...

Gandalf: You don't have a tail

Bilbo: It's an expression.

Gandalf: I don't see it on your face...

Bilbo: .... *whispers to self* he's dumb right now, I can sneak out..*walks calmly out the door* *trips* *ring tumbles outta pocket*

Gandalf: *gasp* BILBO BAGGINS!

Bilbo: .....Damn

Gandalf: You think youre funny huh?
Bilbo: Actually yes
Gandalf: Put the ring into your moneybag! OTHERWISE YOURE GONNA LOSE IT

Gandalf: you sloppy idiot! leave it there! Frodo will bring it to Rivendell soon.
Bilbo: how will i survive without it? its my precioouuuussss

Gandalf: you leave that ring right here

bilbo: stares*

gandalf: dont make me use my staff

bilbo: well i its the one i felt a minute ago have the ring!

*bilbo leaves*

*gandalf goes to pick ring up*

sauron: BOO

audience: *dies*

frodo: BILBO!!....bilbo.....hea already left

gandalf: yes, and he left you everything....even his ring *puts it in envelope*

*throws ring in fire*

gandalf: what can you see

frodo: on the horizon? the ships have come to...

gandalf: no no, on the ring!

frodo: writing,...

gandalf: it is as i thought, saurons ring

frodo: what alerted your suspicions

gandalf: well....when i t made bilbo invisible i knew this as no ordinary ring.....and when i saw saurons eye appear i thought....this could be a ring of power

Frodo: hmm lets destroy it
Gandalf: *laughs*

Originally posted by sauron

gandalf: well....when i t made bilbo invisible i knew this as no ordinary ring.....and when i saw saurons eye appear i thought....this could be a ring of power

Gandalf:and a few minutes ago i incidently visited the old library of minas tirith and my old friend saruman - living 2000 miles from here. He gave me a hint but was a bit bad...

so, now to talk loudly about it

this is saurons ring, keep it secret, keep it safe,

frodo: but sauron was destrtoyed

ring: hahaha well YOUR wrong

gandalf: so you see.....you must go on a mission for me

frdo: why dont you go

gandalf: because....im...erm....a wizard! thats it! and im too strong for a thing of such power

frodo: riiight

*rustle*

gandalf: get ddown!

*pulls sam out from in the bushes*

gandalf: what were you doing in there!

sam: erm...nothing sir

Frodo: is that....oh my god rosie what are you doing in there!

sam: erm 😮 yeah about that....

*at orthanc*

Saruman:"why look who it is my old pal seeking friendship again"

Grima:"i want his hat"

Peter Jackson:"BRAD! get off the set you don't come into this scene yet"

SAruman: well according to Tolkien..."

Gandalf:"*knocks on orthanc* heeelooo?...*wistles*...anybody home?

Saruman😮h yes you what do you want again?"

Gandalf:"i found the one ring..and..."

Saruman"*pushes pj and grima in a hole and runs to gandalf embraCING him tightly*..."WHERE give it to me now...where is it.!!*puls out staff and begins hypnotizing gandalf Jafar style*{sory a little aladin got in there}"i'll do anything for it!!

Gandalf:"anything?"...remember that old beach resort down by The harbours?...we used to play in the DARK caves alone when we were boys?>>>"

Saruman:"never mind come inside" i'll find another way

gandalf: well the one ring

saruman: yes, tell me where it is *looks evil* *laughs evilly*

Gandalf:"some crack-head's got it in the shire..."don't wory i took care of him....

Saruman:"anyway you must bring it to me...

Gandalf:"why you i was gona take it to my buddy sauron"

Saruman:"uh...no gandalf...that would be VERY very bad...do you understand

Gandalf:"*gets impatient jumping up and down*..."Sauron's my friend and why shouldn't i give what is rightfully his!""no!!*trys to leave*
"i'll send one of my hobit slaves on a mission to mordor to hand deliver it to him..that'll show you!"*sticks out tongue*

Saruman:"oh no you don't"*locks gandalf up in high tower*
"AND NO MOTHS ALLOWED!!!"

(((didnt we skip this??)))
(((well then gandalf gets back now aight?)))
okay...
Gandalf: (Pulling out mobile) Hi, could you come rescue me from the orthanc?
Eagle: K. Be there in a few minutes...
Gandalf: *jumps on eagles back*
Eagle (back to shire): thats 24.50 $
Gandalf: here, take the rest as gratuity.

eagle:weee! lets flay as close to the orcs as possible with out getting kileld with spears!!

Gwaihir(eagle):no prob but next time you need me it's gona be double the fee...

Gandalf:"Get out of here...i won't ever need you again...shoo go on get!SHOO!....stupid birds"*wipes feathers from robe*

cuts to scene where frodo and sam are leaving shire heading for bree

EDIT:: and merry and pip too

((in maggots cornfields))
Sam: Mr. Director where is Pippins, Merrys and my conspiracy?
Director: forget it...
Frodo: lets go on acting!
Sam: whaa thats Merry and Pippin!

😖am:"you've been in farmer Magot'sCrop!

Merry:"uh yeah so have you were standin' in it...*duh*

Frodo:"run"

Farmer magot:"com here you BLEEP BLEEP...i'm gona tear youBLEEPIN BLEEPEDY BLEEPS off...!!!"

*falls off cliff and lands on top of a ringwraith*
Frodo:i think we should get off the nazgul"
Merry:mushrooms!...*runs to mushrooms*
Frodo:"get off the nazgul quick..."

the 4 run...
Pippin: Why did you run that slow Frodo?
Frodo: I had a discussion about social economy with #3.
Merry: lets get to the prancing pony i am THIRSTY
Sam: me too!