Translating the Movie...

This is such a great thread. I laugh my ass off every time. Let's see.....

(Jack runs into his old crew during the first movie right after Will and Liz have made off)

Pintel: Well look who it is
Translation: We're all screwed now

(point their weapons at him)

Jack: Par.....snip, par-sley, par, rum (nonsense talk)
Translation: Maybe this is the cleverness, maybe this is a concussion from the oar. I hate Will

Ragetti: Parley?
Translation: I just want someone to listen to me.

Jack: That's it!
Translation: Cleverness wins out over concussion every time.

Ragetti: Parley? I hate whoever came up with parley
Translation: No, I'm really meaning what I say right now.

Jack: That would be the French
Translation: Man, nothing like a fat French girl waitress, blowing raspberries on her fat rolls.......wait! Stop thinking.

(in a few seconds)

Jack: The girl's blood didn't work, did it?
Translation: But I bet some of her works. Ka-ching!

Barbosa: You know whose blood we need?
Translation: Because I'm o-positive and it just didn't work out when I tried it.

Jack: Aye, I know whose blood you need.
Translation: Psh, am I seriously the smartest person in these movies? Put me in a movie with MENSA next time.

I love this thread...it makes me smile...laugh...Awesome....I'll never be able to look at the Pirate movies in the same light...hysterical...can we re-do scenes already done????

HAHAHAHAHAHAH mensa, that was HILARIOUS. 😄 thats so funny.

This isn't very good...i'm not as funny as you guys...but I gave it a try...

WILL TURNER
Jack? Jack Sparrow! I can honestly say
I'm glad to see you!
Translation: I know I haven't seen Jack in a while..but his looks sure have changed....looks hot dressed like that...glad Miss Swann is not here to see this...why is this man so irresistable....it's not fair....I want to be more like him. I'm so happy to see this Pirate I could kiss him..did I just think that....
[Jack says nothing, arises from his throne, walks over to Will]
Translation: (Jack thinking) Oh no..not Bloody Stupid Will what is he doing here...where's the hot chick I left him with....

[Jack pushes one finger into Will's shoulder, as if testing how
much meat Will has on him]

WILL TURNER
Jack! It's me! Will Turner!
Translation: Come on, Jack...you have to remember me...the boy from Port Royal...Bootstrap Bill's son, the eunich....Please, Jack

JACK SPARROW
?: Wa-say kohn.
Translation: How in the world did he find me....what did i just say, I have no idea..he looks bloody ridiculous hanging upside down, such as he is....

?
Een dah-lah. Eeseepi.
Translation: When I see your chick...I'm going to seduce her from right under your stupid bloody nose....THIs is fun

CANNIBAL CROWD
Eeseepi.

WILL TURNER
Tell 'em to let me down.
Translation: Come on, Jack. You can make fun of me all you want...please help me....my head hurts, my hands and feet hurt, gosh, I'm such a whimp

JACK SPARROW
Kay-lay lam. Lam piki-piki. Lam eensy
weensy. Lam say-say... eunuchy. Snip-snip.
Translation: I don't know what I'm saying, but the cannibals understand, this is fun...I can say whatever I want....Will is a eunich, Will is a Eunich...nananabooboo...it's so much fun to make fun of that stupid bloody boy...it will be so easy to seduce his chick...

CANNIBAL CROWD
Ahhh... eunuchy!
Translation: bring this one to the cages, no thing-a-my-bob - no good...

[Jack begins to walk away, as if disinterested, his Compass hangs
from his waist]

WILL TURNER
Jack! The Compass! That's all I need,
Elizabeth is in danger. We were arrested
for trying to help *you*. She faces
the gallows!

[Jack halts, pauses, turns around and casually walks back]
Translation: come on Jack give me that stupid compass that doesn't even work...some ugly little man with a wig wants it and I need it to get Elizabeth back...i'm not very good at rescueing her on my own...I always need your help, darnit.

JACK SPARROW
Say-say lam shoop-shoop sha smalay-lama
shoo-koo. Savvy? Ball licky-licky.
Translation: Ah-ah....if I get out of this mess...I will run off to Port Royal and break the chick out of jail since this stupid bloody boy can't seem to handle that wild adventurous creature...she needs a real man, like me...did I just say ball licky-licky...yep, that's what I'm hoping What's Her Name will do for me when I see her again

Ball licky-licky!

CANNIBAL CROWD
Ball licky-licky!
Translation: all this talk of ball licky-licky is making us want an orgy....can we all jump on our new chief...he sure looks scrumptous....delicious...the Gods were really watching over us when they sent us this hunk of meat to feast on.....

[the cannibals begin chanting, repetitiously]

CANNIBAL CROWD
?Boom-shoo-boom, ?boom-shoo-boom, ?boom-shoo-boom...

JACK SPARROW
Save me!
Translation: Okay, i'll admit, I'm in a pickle....get real, jack, do you really think the stupid bloody eunich is going to save you...he can't save himself or What's Her Name...they always need ME...because I'm the greatest Pirate of all time....sometimes I'm not so sure it's wise to be the Greatest Person ever...look at what being so good-looking has gotten me into now...these cannibals want to eat me...

WILL TURNER
Jack, what did you tell them? No! What
about Elizabeth? *Jack...!*
Translation: Jack...I know you want my woman...I'll use you to help me rescue her....Jack.....help...once I get out of this I'm going to kill that Pirate, as I should have done when I had the chance.

HAHAHAHAHA the line about the pirate crowd wanting an orgy was hilarious..... LOL.... 🙂 Great stuff!

lol hilarious!

that orgy line sure was scrumptious 😄

Jack: No worries mate. Tia Dalma and I go way back. Thick as thieves. Nigh inseperable we are... were... have been... before...
Translation: Okay guys, I'm going to be honest with you. This woman might kill us all. I left her in the middle of a naked twister game- and took all her favorite jewelry.
^genius!!!!

So was the thing about MENSA!
This thread is absolutely amazing!

Liz: Not more pirates...
Translation: Pirates, lots of them! All my fantasies keep coming to life...

Gibbs: Welcome aboard Ms. Elizabeth.
Translation: How can she look so good wet and dirty? Oh yeah, this is a movie...

Liz: Mr. Gibbs?
Translation: Mr. Badger?

Gibbs: Hey boy, where be Jack?
Translation: Where a pretty lady is, Jack must be close behind...

Liz: Jack? Jack Sparrow?
Translation: Oh, when I get my hands on that man... well, it won't be pretty. and the clothes won't stay on long.

Will: He fell behind.
Translation: Dont look at me like that. I'm not bringing him onto this ship with Elizabeth-- do you really think i was going to try to compete with him?!

Gibbs: Keep to the code!
Translation: Dont go ANYWHERE. We are NOT leaving without Jack.

Elizabeth (walking away with Will)
Translation: Damn right we aren't.

From the ship battle in one:

Jack: That's not very nice.
Translation: Touch her and I'll kill you. What would possess you to attack someone so Hott?!

Liz: (whacks other pirate)
Translation: How obvious do I have to make this physical tension?

Jack: Where is the medallion?
Translation: Don't panic, I'm going to have to reach into your dress.

Liz: Wretch!
Translation: Why dont you just look for it in my dress?

Jack: (grabs her hand)
Translation: Pshaw woman, I'm a good man, remember?

Jack: Ah, where is dear William?
Translation: Where's your annoying bodyguard?

Liz: Will...
Translation: Oh yeah, him. Dont know, dont care.

See...Elizabeth has called Jack dispicable and a wretch...I do think the lady protest too much...that's what makes romance novels so exciting...how the two lead characters continually fight their feelings for each other, even so far as to pretend they hate each other...and then when the tensions build up they explode into hot romance...can't wait.

Okay, I will see if I can find another scene to translate...off to read the scripts.

YAYAYAY!!!! I cant wait....

its so true. tension=much hotter relationship when it happens...

oohhh yeah!!!

Hmm, we need more scenes to work with!

Will: My father was not a pirate!
Translation: You're just jealous because there is no union for pirates, whereas the blacksmith one....

Jack: Put it away, son
Translation: He thinks he's scary

(does that thing with the mast and knocks him down)

Jack: Now, there are only two things that matter, what a man can do and what a man can't do.
Translation: Like I can get your girlfriend all hot under the collar and you can't.

Jack: I can just let you drown, but I can't sail this ship to Tortuga all by me onesy, savvy?
Translation (singing): All by myself....

Jack: Either you can accept your father was a pirate and a good man, or you can't.
Translation: It's like choosing tom-ay-to, or tom-ah-to. Pick.

lol tom-ay-to or tom-ah-to!

or pot-ay-to, pot-ah-to. I just thought Jack would prefer tomatoes.

lol y?

I don't usually like tomatoes

i dont like them either. potatoes are WAY better

agreed