The latest ploy to defeat ISIS is to send in a team of Alabama Special Forces.
Billy Bob, Bubba, Boo, Scooter, and Cooter are being sent in with the following information about ISIS:
1. There is no limit.
2. The season opened last weekend.
3. They taste just like chicken.
4. They don't like beer, pickup trucks, country music, or Jesus.
5. Some are queer.
6. They don't like barbecue.
7. They were responsible for Dale Earnhardt's death.
Should be over in just about a week. Don't you think?
At a college, students in a philosophy class prepared for their final exams. They had heard from previous graduates of the class that the final was the absolute hardest part of the course, and were of course studying hard, trying to prepared for anything.
On the day of the test, the nervous students came in and sat down. The philosophy professor comes in, and sets a lone chair upon the table at the front of the lecture hall. On the board he writes, "Prove to me the chair does not exist."
Most of the students look panicked, and begin to scribble madly at their desks. One student, though, writes a few words and hands his paper in. The teacher reads the paper, and smiles.
Wrote the student, "What chair?"
One day a housework-challenged husband decided to wash his sweatshirt. Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to his wife, "What setting do I use on the washing machine?"
"It depends," she replied. "What does it say on your shirt?"
He yelled back, "University of North Carolina."
And they say blondes are dumb...
A Woman was in the hospital about to give birth whilst the doctor was telling the husband about a new machine that can transfer some of the pain of giving birth onto the father to help the wife. The husband agreed and as the wife started giving birth the doctor turned on the machine and told the husband that this will be more painful than anything else he had felt before.
The husband felt no pain so the doctor turned up the machine until the pain transfer was at 100% and the wife had an almost painless delivery.
When they got home the postman was dead on the porch.
This video contains a HILARIOUS joke!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!